my girlfriend broke up with me.
she says she is scared to hurt me.
afraid I will get too close
but she said she couldn’t be in a relationship right now
her parents are making her pay for rent.
she is 16
I am hurting for her
I can see her childhood going
she is getting a second job to pay rent to her family
they are not poor
she is assembling documents and researching emancipation
I cant do anything
I can see her falling apart
she is seeing this guy.
they have a
thing
I’ve had a pretty rough life. From the time I was born I could tell I was unwanted. My mom and dad went to work and left me with the baby sitter day after day. They’d just come home, not even glance at me, and go to sleep. I didn’t mind that though. As long as my parents were asleep they weren’t fighting. Their fights were bad. They would yell, scream, kick, and fight. It was awful. I can remember countless nights where I would hide under my bed behind my box of hotwheels praying to whatever god existed that they would just stop fighting. […]
I love her because she’s perfect. Contrary to popular belief she is absolutely perfect. From the way her hair looks in the morning to the way her feet are always warm, she is perfect. I love her for being that person who looks into my eyes – who reaches into my soul to bring out the hope and happiness. I love her for the way seeing her smile, can bring tears into my eyes. I love her for her heart and how it’s big, compassionate and kind. I love her for her soul, which everyday shines brighter and brighter through her eyes. I love her […]
So when i was about 5 i lost my parents, well at the time none of my family wanted me so i went to foster care. When i was about 8 years old i was adopted by great parents, or at least i thought. Growing up it was alright i got picked on alot though because ive always had short hair my whole life ive had it. Well it wasnt until recently that i had started coming out with being a lesbian. Everyone hated me at my school. I only had one friend which was my sister Amber. Im 13 and shes 14. I became […]
This is going to be long, I apologize in advance. I guess I can start by saying I am a 16 year old girl, although I hardly resemble a girl, and very depressed. I have been depressed for almost 2 years. I self harm, but cutting usually, I’ll pull my hair in the extremely emotionally painful moments, or I’ll pinch my arms. Its been a year since I have posted here, but I’m in need of some type of empathy. My family on a scale from 1-10, is a good strong 7.5, we have our fights, but i generally thing we all do love one and […]
I need stability and a clear mind.
In July, my best, Eleanor, lost* her father.
In August, she lost* her mother. Eleanor and her brother then moved into her grandmother’s house.
In September, her aunt flew down from Brooklyn. Eleanor, her brother, and her grandmother moved to NYC with the aunt. By and by, in my own personal life, my uncle died suddenly. I was very close to him and needed him very much.
In early October, my english teacher had two heart attacks in very quick succession, and she died.
Let me clear something up: I am not sad that these people died. It sounds cold, but let me explain. In the […]
I can’t take it anymore! All that’s left for me in life is a gun. I’m never going to acomplish anything in life, and even if I do, I won;t even begin to compare with my dear sister’s acomplishments. I don’t see the point in living if all that goes throught my head is depression and confusion. Confusuin to what I am. I know I like other girls, and my friends have accepted that, but am I bi or Lesbian. Bi is one thing, but would they accept lesbian? Not only that, but this is my last year of freedom. I’,m pretty much out at […]
I hope nobody i know ever see it, and i hope that feeling will vanish soon.
But, it’s hard. Living unhealthy, unhappy, and lonely.Waking up, knowing the difficulties waiting ahead, the lack of stimulation, ….the limitations that my health imposes me.
Spending too much time at the hospital, in need to be fixed. Can i return that broken body of mine? I wish.
When i feel out of breath, when i can’t take it, i think of going, leaving, you know? Dying.
It’s not as i wanna take my life. It’s a feeling of…expecting, hoping, not to wake up .Wishful thinking.
Will my heart give up now? Tomorrow? Tic tac, […]
I learned this recently. The story is very confusing. Are you ready?
This is who I thought I was: a severely schizophrenic German boy, who was severely abused as a child, alongside his twin sister. He has a boyfriend, who also has a twin. He is in Foster care.
Who I really am: a Canadian girl, less severely abused, with no twin, no boyfriend, and no Foster care.
What happened: I have multiple personalities. I suppose I’m transgender, because all the personalities are male. I am also schizophrenic, though not as badly as previously thought. The original personality, the female birthed 18 years ago next week, is gone. […]
OK, so I’ve been depressed and stuff. My other post was “Wishing, Waiting, Dieing………” . Anyway, if you’ve already read that. Then you’ll understand this one alot more (probably). So, I’ve been really confused these past few weeks (besides depressed, suicidal, ect). First, I’m a lesbian and I have a girlfriend. But I’m not sure if I wanna be in a relationship right now. Because, as you know, I’m suicidal and I’m afraid that I may do something stupid (if you know what I mean) and hurt her. And I don’t want to hurt her. Although I know she will be hurt if I let […]
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