Suicide has been very much on my mind for a long time. For as long as I remember, the thought of putting an end to my life would come up whenever I experienced pain, confusion, unhappiness. Pouf! Jump off the window and put an end to all that! That urge to jump into the air remains with me. I do consider other ways of killing myself from time to time, sleeping pills, hanging…hanging particularly appeals to me despite the gruesome sight of someone hanging from a rope. I don’t think I will act on those feelings. I have a child for whom I am responsible. […]
Tag:
Oblivion
When I think about life and the meaning of it, I realise that there actually isn’t any meaning to it at all. Basically, the less than 100 years given to us on the planet are nothing compared to the infinity of death waiting for us.
Life is fleeting and death is eternal. What’s even the point?
For every second of our lives, there’s an infinity of death out there, biding its time.
I understand the whole ‘you make your own meaning’ thing about life, and that it’s ‘what you make it’, but that doesn’t give it any more relevance in my opinion.
Right now I’m actually happy, which makes […]
ive been thinking alot lately. We all know where that leads us. But I think I really should be dead. No one cares for me in my life, no one even cares on this website. I should’ve died. How nooses n pills n razors n 30 amps of electricity didn’t kill me I don’t know. But I’m positive this 12gauge will. So to all of you who won’t be missing me, adieu. I’ll see you all in oblivion.
Can’t bear the pain of being so despised, by the people I need to give me strength. Antidepressants don’t work, have been taking them for years. I get admitted to hospital, and get pumped full of drugs, I am ok for while but then, again I am kicked down into the hole for another year. They tell me I’m being indulgent, but I just want to hide from the world. Have become a hermit, can’t eat, can’t sleep, can’t drive or go to the shop. 15 years in the hole is unbearable. I don’t believe it’s a medical issue, but the only response to the […]
To be not human. Sometimes I just sit for hours and watch my cat, he’s so happy and oblivious, I wonder how that feels. I know it’s a childish thought but it passes through my mind a lot. Our intellect is what makes us brilliant, but it’s also our biggest defect. We think much deeper and broader than any house cat. I’m not saying I wish I were a cat either. As easy as that would be I imagine it would be awfully dull, not that cats have a concept of dull.
I don’t know what stops me from doing it, I know my life […]
To A Breathless Oblivion by The Black Dahlia Murder
the chair’s been kicked a rope tied to the rafters
blue faced and broken necked I sigh
relieving my vision from the sick mocking stare
of that hated sun burning the sky
slumped like a headless scarecrow
cold and limp against the wall
blood paints a pattern of rorschach’s design
thawing the winter that burdens this heart
shit stained and shameful
an exit in disgrace
not a splash but just a ripple left
I end this life in vain
in vain
in the dead of the darkness I breach the still lake
toward the reflection of […]
Hey all 🙂
ok so im not going to go into some long story about how i ended up here but iv been through a few threads and have similar experiances to some on this site, basically my illness is anxiety and depression (depression resulting from the anxiety). My questions is for everyone who has made a FINAL decision to end there life (without a doubt) no cries for help BS etc. Personally i believe no one wants to die and suicide is a choice between the lesser of 2 evils. 1. Living in misery / pain (terminal illness) or faceing oblivion with the possibility of […]
I am as empty as I am alone.15 years of fighting my impulses and depression has left me little more than a shell.I’ve been waiting for life to show me that it’s worth living,but I think I’ve lost the point somewhere along the way.I feel like I’m drowning.I don’t talk to anyone about the way I feel,and noone seems to care.I’ve done and been through so much,but it’s never the good stuff that stays with me.It’s the pain and heartbreak that haunts me.My pain has far outweighed my ability to cope and it seems like things get worse every year.I destroy everything I touch and […]
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