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A loser till the end.

by comfortably numb
written by comfortably numb

This is probably the first time that I’ve ever posted somewhere about the issues regarding life‚ hey I’m sure everyone has them‚ but I’m atthe verge of contemplating ending it all.

My childhood was kinda great‚ until the point Ialmost got molested by a guy my dad worked for at the age of 10 thankfully I got the idea what he was “doing”. Another instance was where a distant older cousin she did molest me a little but I’m not sure its like a vague memory I’ve trapped which comes back only in bits I was a 11 year old boy then. I am the youngest […]

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I’m tired

by discouragedmom
written by discouragedmom

I’m almost 40, single mom, last year at this time we lost 3 family members in 3 weeks. All of them unexpected, one of them to suicide.

With my home in chaos, mess I can’t catch up on or keep up with, mice in the building, children who won’t attend school and won’t help out, a job I don’t like that doesn’t pay enough but I can’t quit because I can’t get anything else (limited availability due to kids, I don’t have a drivers licence, I didn’t graduate from college despite 4 years of classes and good grades)

my youngest son was just diagnosed as being on […]

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I’m Tired

by Danny
written by Danny

Things like these are always hard to type aren’t they? Or maybe I’m just awkward, heh.

 

My name is Daniel, but I tend to go by Danny. I’m 17 years old about to turn 18 in May but I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t want to keep living. Why? That’ s a hard question to answer and I don’t want to bore you with stories but I’ve become really tired. Many think that 17 years isn’t long at all but in my eyes it’s like a century, not that I’m calling people older than me ridiculously old but that’s just how I feel , ya know?

I’ve […]

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I’m new here…again

by majesticwalrus
written by majesticwalrus

I used to come on to this site kind of frequently a while ago, but I’ve spent the last couple of years without internet and kind of homeless for a large part of it, so I haven’t gotten a good rant out in a long time.  There’s your warning to skip, ’cause here it goes.

I was born premature from a very stressful pregnancy, my mom actually went into labor upon finding out my dad was cheating.  My earliest memories are of my dad getting me drunk as a fucking kid and kicking the shit out of me.  Even worse than him doing it was when […]

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I give it a year…of Silver Linings

by BeteBlonde
written by BeteBlonde

Which is not an easy thing to say, since it was about this same time last year that I was feeling the same way. My “Bete Noir” {Black Beast…it’s what I call my depressed self. I’m bipolar and my depressed self is NOT ME. This much I know to be true…} has surfaced and I’m in worse shape this year. I’ve lost my home; was fired from my job; lost everything I owned that was in storage for the past few years because I couldn’t afford the fees. Still have my old car but haven’t been able to afford insurance, so my license is probably […]

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********

by Sure
written by Sure

looking at post i wanted to get in touch with writer but the dates were old, so ill post, the writer said he just bot the tank, cracked it a bit and wallaaaaah…  im having trouble with the 400 dollar price of the exit site regulator and the welder supply said they have nothing at all that allows a constant flow….(oops this was for a helium idea, now im thinking ********) Someone said they know all about ******** here, could you tell me why i cant just crack it open and walllaaaahh, actually, this would be as close as i can get so it would […]

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Whàt have you learnt from somebody in your life?

by mick9999
written by mick9999

Have you learnt some pivotal life skills from a relative or older friend?

Has a friend or family member taught you some life skills that you swear by now?

Have you learnt some life skills over time as a result of harsh life experience?

Your contribution could be the one thing someone needs to hear to prevent the thought of self harm and maybe lift them from their depression.

I take people by face value, I never trust the testimony of others when determining an opinion on someone. I’ll listen and respect their comment, but at the end of the day, I’ll make my own decisions on who is […]

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I don’t know what to do

by dreamer20
written by dreamer20

I have been in this depressed state for as long as I can imagine. I am now 20 years old and have been feeling hopeless ever since I was about 11 or 12. I’ve hated my life since then and nothing has gone right for me. This is the first time on this, making this my first post. I have had such a lonely life for as long as I can imagine and I’ve never felt worse than I do now.

I am basically the black sheep of my entire family. I do not talk to anyone, no on invites me to anything (from my cousins), […]

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Mind made up continued

by lostfather
written by lostfather

Well I have just a couple days left before I leave this place for good. I have arranged to see my two youngest daughters on this day so I can hold them in my arms one last time and tell them how much I love them. Nobody sees this coming and I am sure it will shock them all, but it will look like an accident as I have done my work. I have my notes wrote to my daughters and a will that is notarized leaving both my daughters everything. Life should not be this hard as I have contemplated this for years as […]

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For once I think I’m actually excited.

by Bri
written by Bri

I’ve been feeling like shit really for the past few months, and my friend called and asked if I wanted to hang out. Of course I said yes…

This morning started out normal for a Sunday morning (in my house at least) my older brother and his wife arguing, my older brother being a total dick… But I’m feeling a bit better, and I’m surprised that I haven’t cried yet. (it’s only 10AM so knock on wood)

I think… it really does make a difference having someone who actually cares around, sure my parents care but then again they let my demons follow me- and won’t let […]

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Since I was…Born.., I need help… a great listener please!

by TrisPrior
written by TrisPrior

Ever since the start of my life, I have wanted it to end, to die.
I was a baby [ idk how old] and I simply DIDN’T want to live, so I ate Christmas lights. I remember that day. I didn’t want to be there and its not THERE that I didn’t want to be. It was there as in alive. I was searching for things to kill myself with and found Christmas lights. I figured the light and glass would kill me, so I ate them.
2 years old I tried to run in front of a car.
3 years old I tried to […]

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When I say I hate you it’s because it’s “too soon” to say I love you

by psychoticbip
written by psychoticbip

I tell you I hate you every time I feel like saying I love you. I never want to seem crazy but I feel crazy crazy that once again I have failed feeling too much over a course of months. My father said love was a myth for the fools. How mythical of me to fall in love with a fool. Poor little fool who can’t seem to love me. If only he had the ability to feel what I feel how I feel it we’d be able to prove daddy wrong.  So instead I say the second strongest word I feel hate because I […]

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meaningless life of a mediocre mom

by dottie
written by dottie

I am only living because I have kids and I don’t want to hurt them. Everyone I have ever trusted has lied to me, abused me or left me. I used to be niave and full of hopes, forgiveness and stamina. The older my kids get, the closer I get to suicide. When they are on their own and they leave me, I will definitely choose an exit plan. Lately, I think I may not be able to wait. I am not talented or skilled in any area  even though I have tried many things. I’m best at loving others but no one values me […]

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I already feel dead.

by Shovaz
written by Shovaz

I’ve been on several websites for suicide now.  All forums.  I suppose I keep coming to search for something.  Maybe a reply that says it’s okay.  I’m an atheist, so I don’t want to hear anything that has to do with your Jesus, Allah, etc.  I also don’t want to hear anything about waiting longer for shit might actually change in two, three, or ten years.  I’ve been depressed since I was in middle school.  I’m 21 now.  It started when I was a child.  It’s obviously the cause for my stupidity to begin with.  My childhood was filled with many forms of abuse.  My […]

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February 27 the day it ends

by RandyB
written by RandyB

For the past 10 years I’ve have picked the same day to kill myself and I don’t know if I can make  to that day this year. I dropped out of school when I was 16 and never been able to get a job. I can’t ask for help no matter how much I want to. Last year I showed my older brother the notes of suicidal thoughts and posted on Facebook I was having thoughts of suicide hoping someone would help me but no one did and everyonwe just forgot , know I’m at a the point were I don’t want any. I can’t […]

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So Let’s Get This Started Shall We?

by hyrosgirl6523
written by hyrosgirl6523

When I was younger all I wanted to do was be an amazing person…

I wanted to be in the military, or become a lawyer,or an Olympic swimmer. As I got older something inside of me changed, I started losing myself. I lost people I loved and cared about. I was hurt by the mean kids in school. I was hurt by the people I wanted to love me that I loved so much, by the people that I wanted to make proud but no matter what I did I was just never good enough for. I realized that even if I […]

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When I was a little girl I dreamed well created A LIFE

by psychoticbip
written by psychoticbip

and in this life never did I see so much hurt and pain. As a child I was attracted to the light to the happiness but as I grew older and realized that you can’t plan life that little dream of mine grew distant and blurry I knew that I’d have to runaway to find this dream of mine. My dream house grew colder day by day and suddenly i was no longer attracted to the light. Happiness made me uncomfortable I knew how quickly it could all end. I felt company with the darkness being happy felt lonely. We are told so many stories […]

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I don’t even know what this is

by tasteforsuicidal
written by tasteforsuicidal

I have never been one to share my personal thoughts or feelings. I try to go throughout life quietly, minding my own business and not involving anyone with my personal affairs. That being said, this was difficult to publish into cyber space, among all the folks who have nothing better to do but verbally attack other human beings from behind a screen. I know that. But here I am. I have never been a “glass half full” type of person. I’m more of a “the entire lake is dried up” kind of gal. Which is why I found it strange and even checked myself for […]

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i hate being alive

by jaberpuddle
written by jaberpuddle

i see myself as a realist. the glass is full to me half with liquid and half with vapor; but it’s all water. i will never tell anyone that it gets better. the older i get, the harder everything is. i do think it is worth getting out of bed each day, even if i’m not working. i live for fleating moments of happiness. it’s always something simple. i take joy in nature. just a 5 minute walk can change my mood. but in general, my heart is half full of hate & half with love. i am good at hiding the hate, but after […]

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nostalgia

by soonerthecosmos
written by soonerthecosmos

just saw a christmas countdown on the news.37 days til christmas.where the fuck did the time go?

now i’m all anxious since i haven’t found a job, been unemployed for almost a year.and it’s crushing me since i promised myself that i would make our family’s 2014 holiday celebrations grand.i’ll fund it, make my parents happy and proud,be the best eldest sis giving presents to my siblings.give grown-up gifts to my relatives as a sign of gratitude.bake a lovely cake, impress my bf and his family.
shit, i’m not going to be able to do any of that.none of that.i’m a fucking disgrace, a loser.it’s making […]

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