does love really exist if so why does it always end and why did they invent the phrase true love because love lost it’s meaning i see old couples that have been together longer then i have been alive but isn’t that just the ability to put up with the other persons b.s. i’m only 16 so i don’t know much about love but i know enough to question it so does love exist or is it an illusion…
Tag:
Phrase
someone said we are all destined for greatness
then why is the world this why today
wouldn’t they have realized they were
“destined for greatness”
looking deeper into the meaning of the phrase
we are all destined to be the greatness of our capability
she could not help that she was brought up into a family with enough money for one school outfit
though no one knew she had the voice of an angel and could be a famous singer
but instead she died at 19 in gang shooting
he was not a piano prodigy
his parents paid for the countless hours of practice so […]
I am still alive. now at the age of 21 looking back on what i have been trough and it starts making sense again.
I reached to the breaking point again and remembered this site from long ago and was thinking i should spill my thoughts here.
I never told much about my self from the few posts i made here and now i feel is the time to reveal some details about myself just so things would seem more clearly.
so what to begin with? since when i was a little kid our family had lots of problems. we never were a big family, […]
I am drowning in my depression.
I am unable to reach out to anyone, because I have no one to reach out to. I have lost what friends I had because I was “a bummer to be around.” I did what I could do mask my feelings, but I can’t, not anymore.
I am writing this not looking for sympathy, but to simply tell my story, and maybe, for once, I can be of some worth.
I was raised with one simple phrase beaten into my head, I am worthless. Whether I am or not, does not matter when that is the only thing you feel: worthless. I […]
Thought I had something important to say. I lost my job a few months ago. Redundancy. Which should be shit, but I hated it anyway, and everyone I worked for, and redundancy is the best way to leave a job.
Anyway, I wanted to type something meaningful, but the only phrase going through my head is “fuck it” so I don’t anticipate anyone getting many nuggets of wisdom out of this post.
I dreamed about putting a gun in my mouth last night. The barrel tasted of bourbon. Wish it were real. Not out of any need for attention or anything, I’m just tired. I think I’ve […]
I am so freaking awesome Is what I tell my self when I wake up….
I go Througth my day repeating this phrase eating on every word
And it helps
Till you’re eyes become filled with tear
Then you say ,about five times, fuck being depressed I am fucking awesome.
It helps for an hour or two
Then the words become meanaless
Then you add some humor
And repeat the words I am so freaking awesome
I bet no tears will comeback that day
Your fucks in life will not be giving ^^
Repeat daily …it will help for a while
I die inside so you can smile
I limp to my room so you can run a mile
I wear rags so you can have style
I cry inside so you can play outside in the leaf pile
I can break this family with one phrase
I could end their naive daze
Mom won’t think its just a phase
and it wont just be my heart set ablaze
But quiet ill stay for the sake of them all
I can take the pain no matter how big or small
I can “Trip” down the stairs and fall
I can get hit in the face with a “Soccer ball”
I live in hell so you can live care […]
So, I’m not entirely sure what I hope to gain from this, maybe closure? I don’t know. Not even sure how this would give me closure, or what I need it for…
If I had to describe a depressed person, I doubt I would use me. Someone with a job, caring family, good friends, hobbies. Hell even my dog is great. Yet there is just all the small things. My job is lacking, and kinda crappy. My family… for lack of a better phrase, doesn’t understand me. My friends are funny, good to be around, but I wouldn’t say that any bonds are really there. It […]
I will not kill myself. I can’t, I just have too much potential. However, I just have this urge to do it anyways. Half of the time, I want to live just to learn about the universe and the wonders of science. Yes, that is right. I only live in the name of science and the curiosity spectrum of my mind. But then half of the time, I tell myself that there is no incentive of living. Let me lay this down for you: I have amnesia (or maybe even Alzheimer at a relatively early age). My mind […]
I haven’t been here for a while. And honestly, when I came back, I wasn’t expecting much of any attention. I nearly thought this was going to be like facebook, with people saying ‘oh u shuldn’t b sad all the time u shuld b happi!’ but no.
Instead? People are supportive. Encouraging to live, not die. I was wrong about this place. Maybe this is a new leaf being turn? Or some sort of phrase like that, I don’t know..
But for those who are/may be concerned, life has gotten to a standstill. I’m neither happy nor sad on this year’s holidays. Maybe it’s for the best […]
Did some chores earlier and I’m drained. Windex, Pine Sol, Soap and Pledge all help make cleaning possible. Also make the lungs burn with a mask on to boot. I’m feeling tired and a tad weak. The kind of tired that you’re unable to sleep. Add onto that some anxiety. This brain takes a lot to quiet it down and the solution is to overwork till I can no longer hold a lot of weight. Till my heart pounds like I’ve done a dash. Till my hips feel like water. Thankfully I didn’t do that kind of work. The kind that aggravates the hips. But […]
I pop on most days to work on a project, or to write a reply. Some days I’ll just read quietly. I speak up when I have something to share but I realize my voice just like before doesn’t mean much.
When I was younger I was a listener and I was forced to be a talker. To be a talker to make myself clear and to stop assumptions about me.
A phrase rings through my head “You can’t be a hero” at 12 years old my father did everything to crush my hopes. I did little things, I donated a little money, I held open […]
A mind that asks many questions
A mind mind that realizes there will never be any answers
A pair of eyes that cry in the wrong direction
A red heart longing for affection
I know the truth
And I want my heart to stop beating
For love in another means nothing if your own is slowly depleting
I’ve hated my life and the people who had to be in it
The horrible ones
And my useless mind and it’s emotions
No I’ve done my meditation
And like a band aid it covers over the wound temporarily
And I’ve been in counselling
And few understand I’m rare you see
And […]
Dead inside for a long time. Years. I want to go, but I can’t yet. Things get worse the longer I wait.
I only just discovered this site today and I’m comforted to see that many people think like I do about this subject. I guess I feel validated in a way…even “normal” in my thought processes about it all. Thank you for that!
I have two previous “attempts.” People said it was (I HATE this phrase) “a cry for help.” Actually I was too stupid to know that the drugs I used wouldn’t kill me and only land me in the hospital, […]
I found a really neat phrase the other day: “Pyrrhic victory”.
It comes from the Greek general Pyrrhus who fought & won a battle against the Romans but it cost him so many lives he said another victory like that would ruin him.
I feel like my entire life is a Pyrrhic victory. I’m surviving, so I guess I’m victorious. But at what cost? My mind is utterly ruined. I’ve made bitter enemies of everyone who ever knew me. My soul, if ever I had one, is so dark and heavy it’ll drag me down for 100 lifetimes.
What I can’t understand for the life of me is […]
My whole life has been a battlefield. It’s just I am not like most people I know. Maybe I am way too sensitive for the kind of world I live in. I hate the ethics of how the world works, or possibly the lack of. Anytime I get out of my house I look around me  and think “Why do people choose to be bad?”… Yes, many people are simply bad people or just confused. Maybe if we had the answers to life after death, then maybe the world would work in unison, but obviously we’ll never know until we face death. Now I have […]
I want to disappear. I don’t think I want to die as such, I just don’t want to exist, either.
That’s it really, I just don’t want to exist anymore. If I could just flick a switch and not be here anymore, I would. I would do it straight away, no questions asked. I suppose that switch is basically a permanent one, a switch of life or death.
That’s the thing though, I’m unsure whether it’s suicide I want. I want to not be here but I don’t want to be dead.
So am I suicidal? Is it suicidal to just want to disappear?
I hate the word ‘suicide’, […]
I have grown so weary of the tired old statement that those who commit suicide are selfish for not thinking about the effect on their families. I always get a small laugh of disdain when I hear this idiocy. When in truth nine times out of ten the Family itself is usually at the very root of the persons suicide. The Family are in My opinion the selfish ones. They demand so much from you,lord over and dominate your life. They make you trade away the things you love for what THEY approve of. They only think of themselves and how you can best serve […]
my baby girl loves me. I know she does. I love her, so I hold her as I cry, or I force myself to smile back at her. It feels like my life is falling apart right now. Maybe it’s not, but how do I know? I have made so many mistakes. And I googled the phrase “would someone care if I die”, even though I know the answer. She would care. She loves me, and I love her. So I bear on. And sometimes I think :”she doesn’t deserve a broken mother” maybe if I… But no. No one will love her as much […]
This is a vent or rant. I believed life would be fair. I watched tv and it rotted my brain.
I thought one day I would meet a special guy. I met one that I thought was special 9 years ago. He really made me forget about the guy I had a crush on for few years. This man was my first boyfriend at 28 years old. You can believe I thought I would have met a guy that actually was attracted to me before then, but that did not happen. Now I question what if any feelings the guy I met back then had for […]
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