I graduated from college two years ago. After graduation, I suffered from deep depression for complex reasons. I cried crazily and I am very suicidal. I couldn’t even go outside to seek a job. For a year, I just stay at home, isolated from all people and handle my emotion. In 2013, I went outside to seek professional helps, including psychologist, doctor and social worker. However, none of them think I need help. They just ask me to seek a job outside. In fact, I sent out many resume outside, none of them replied to me. Then, they told me just to work in restaurant, […]
Resume
My greatest fear when thinking about taking my own life is the family I have with me and that care for me. I’m so lucky to have both my parents together still, and that would do anything for me. I also have a sister, brother in law, and two nieces whom all of I adore. I’m 24 years old and I feel like I’ve never experienced a normal life. I’m gay,and I also have other problems that make me self conscious of my appearance so I hate being in public or any places with many people, so I cant go to gay bars or any […]
I am kind of enjoying a rare peaceful moment…the hour is almost midnight, I am in my bedroom and the window is cracked to let in the cold brittle air of this winters night in yet I hear only the softest of rain patter. It is calming, and the waft of water is cleansing as I breath it in.
Earlier today I was stressed with resume writing for a job I don’t even want to apply for. Then I found a different post and thought, yes, I could do this, and it was easier to write to the qualifications this posting wanted! […]
It is Tuesday in the a.m
I am so tense, there is so much to do to just get out the door.
Physio at ten then the appt for getting on a good track with my life with the resume and skills session at the womans outreach place.
it feels good to dump this tension on here, this helps, woke up a million times through the night and still exhausted but have to keep on going forward
I feel so incredibly not ready for today and my physical symptoms are really really uncomfortable and everything is tensed up to the max.
This is my reality and […]
I have an awful lot of hope placed on tomorrows’ appointment!!!!!!
I tried my best to come up with as much info for the resume writing ‘cuz all my papers are in T.O.
I am literally exhausted right at this moment thinking about getting up in the morning and going to that appointment
..but I need to do this for me…I will do this for me…
I told my daughter about the appt. she is pleased for me…she knows not of my depression 🙁
I told my recent friend about the appt. he is happy for me…he knows about my depression 🙁
If they can’t help […]
I am making a list of things that I could do to help me make it to Tuesday…
aside from stuffing my face with crap (which does not help in any way) what can I realistically do / accomplish / come up with / fabricate / engineer / occupy my time with / invent / rearrange / be proactive about / just to get on with it?
* take a shower
* eat a healthy breakfast
* work on details of a resume to help myself on Tuesday so the appointment I am putting such stock and hope in is able to help me go forwards…..
(I was going to put this as a comment under my picture but, I didn’t really want to start a big discussion there about jobs and the economy)
Please, would someone just listen to me? Sometimes I feel like I’m talking to a brick wall.
I really, honestly appreciate the thoughts and ideas for what I can do. However, I am not stupid. I KNOW my options. I know what to do and how to be and what to say. Even though I’ve talked about myself in a few posts and comments here doesn’t mean you really know me or what my life is like.
I […]