me and Ryan kinda jumped into things very fast. He moved in with me after two weeks, but we were happy as can be. I was always weary that he was lying to me, because that’s just what I’ve always been used to. But everything he said always added up. He was extremely supportive of everything, including my mental illnesses. we were in everything together. Ryan comes from a very rough child hood. Him & his siblings were taken away from his parents when I believe he was three. He found his mom when he was 18, and moved in with her. I actually met […]
Tag:
right
Yeah, that’s right. You heard me. You’re beautiful. No matter what you think, you are. If no one has told you that today, then I will. Because you are. Sometimes it just takes the help of someone else to see that.
Today I was feeling pretty down this morning. It took the help of a friend to pick me up again. I suffer from depression and earlier this spring, I suffered my worst episode yet that ended with me calling the Suicide Hotline at twelve in the morning. Needless to say, I found out that there weren’t any actually resources to help me in my local […]
I just.. I feel so empty. Yeah, normally its easy to laugh it off and hide behind a mask, act normal, human even. But right now, when I’m sitting at home and in bed, all of my walls come down. I feel so weak and hopeless- and of course my parents choose this very moment to tell me how worthless I am and how I’ll never amount to anything and how I should have been more like my brother. The worst part? I agree with them.
I’m not anything special; I don’t have any outstanding talents- and trust me on this. I can read people […]
Hello everybody. I really hate alot of things about myself. I recently discovered that I’m transsexual. I’m an 18 year old attending college to get a mechanical engineering degree. I feel like if I transition I’m going to destroy everything I worked for because I heard that workplaces just hate hiring transgender people. I also feel like if I transition I’m going to end up still looking manly due to being fat, acne ridden and hairy. I am also half black and from what I researched and understand black male to female transgender people don’t transition well. And to make things worse I’m not able […]
So I’m 19…and supposedly a girl who has the world going for me. I’m “pretty” and smart and everyone loves me.
So they tell me. When I was 11, my mom abandoned me to a city who devoured me like the storm devours ships. I was gangraped nightly, used, abused, beaten…..starved, and tied to a bed for days at a time.
I’ve suffered losing everyone close to me, either being left or God takes them from me.
I found a guy that loved me for everything I was….and man I feel hard. And I was doing okay….until May 2nd, 2014 when I lost my daughter, Dylan Michelle…at 6:30 […]
I could really use some right now… I feel like shit and I know it won’t get better at least today. I want someone to talk to but at the same time I’d rather not burden anyone with my presence.
something so beautiful and puzzling about the quickness in which ants die, when there’s just a bunch all swarming to a tiny bit of mountain dew that’s spilled on the counter, completely indulging in their desire. ants can’t really do much except mate and eat. human activities for ‘fun’ are just our creation… so, when ants give into their desires and slurp mountain dew and piss off humans, are they sinning, or what? do they even know they’re making people mad? or do they just think it’s a gift from above? do ants even think at all? does any thinking that humans do or anything […]
I don’t really know why I am posting here or why it is that I am sharing this with strangers.
I think all the things happening in my life right now that have driven me over the edge are irrelevant.
The anxiety and pain are almost gone and I feel completely numb.
I thought about Suicide before, many times. And every time I got very close.
Right now I am as close to finalizing it as never before, being alone in a hotel room, away from my loved ones, with 7 bottles of prescription pills lined up in the side table.
And the silly thing is, all I can think […]
2day is a good day. My beloved and I have been celebrating his father’s birthday with our best friend KK. sometimes the very thing that u need is right in front of you .
Wished i could get off the bed right now, but i cant, why? Because i just cant. Its so warm and cozzy here. Wanna join me?
No i cant, i am too busy planning my demise.
Ok no problem, hey! Will you join us at Bob’s place today?
No i cant, cant you see, i just want to kill myself, i just want to jump off a bridge or stick a big fat knife right above my navel, can you help me?
Hell no, what do you want to go about jumping off bridges and sticking knife in you navel for?
I am depressed
you re depressed, i […]
The night before last I let my anchor go – the only person who held me somewhat together. He broke up with me last year after a few years of long distance dating but we remained close friends up until now. He has a new girlfriend and it was clear he was drifting further away from our friendship no matter how much he denied it. I don’t blame him. He was broken like me when I met him, not suicidal that I know of but certainly depressed, and over the years he has gotten better and I have not.
It was probably horrible of me but […]
2day is a good day. My husband and I have been created celebrating his father’s birthday with our best friend KK. sometimes the very thing that u need is right in front of you .
Suicide is the ultimate form of giving up. In 2001 while watching the movie :CAST AWAY” this poem just came to me. I’m posting here, right now for givingup It goes like this:
What if I gave up today
and tomorrow I won the lottery?
What if I gave up today
And tomorrow I met the woman of my dreams?
What if I gave up today
And tomorrow I started living my dreams?
What if I gave up today
And tomorrow I figured out how to be successful?
What if I gave up today
And tomorrow I came to know I deserved what I want?
What […]
So much sadness.I am going to be very quiet.I am going to be very still. If I do this I can stop trying to explain to them what the matter is,and for that matter,ANYTHING I want to talk of to them…its all no good -they do not want to know.Ive worn their love and interest right the fuck out of them .Nothing I can say about anything is of any relevance.I either go from here and wander til I find a way to live,or to die…or I lay here and die..
I just feel like I am the only person who really feels and thinks the way that I do. To me, everything seems like a dream, like one of these days I will wake up and things will be completely different. Who I am right now cannot possibly be the person who I once was and who I really am. Everything is hazy and I can’t remember that person clearly but I feel like I know that he exists, he’s just lost. This barely makes sense to me as a write it and I don’t think I would ever be able to explain it clearly […]
I will kill myself in december when I wont get admission in my favourite college to pursue my passion. I have some months in hand. I will ..be so sad then I might fall back again into depression. I mean right now things are okay so u see im alive still after two attempts. But then people will have a reason to see why I died. If I died now people will call me a fool. Im useless I wont pass the examination so there comes no question of admission. Waiting for that precious day.. when I will rent a hotel and there I will […]
who else ?????? so tired … i slept in the afternoon, i washed a lot of clothes today, im not depressed, im good right now, but i want to kill myself, but i have everyone around me, and i live on the third floor, so cannot jump. im safe.
hello, my name is fading star… obviously not my real name but lets just call me this for now. ever since i could remember all i have wanted to do is help people…. right so while my entire life I’ve helped people I’ve never really looked after myself, helped myself. I’m 16 years old and feel like my life is no where. I’m not the complaining type but i’m falling apart with everything bursting inside me unable to handle by myself.
when i was a child i lived in poverty now most people live in poverty right?? well when i was a child my family did […]
Definition of Irony: Receiving Invoice from the Ambulance Company after a Failed Suicide
by TChambers
written by TChambers
The only thing more pathetic than a person committing suicide is a person that fails epically at it…
“He knows that you have to laugh at the things that hurt you just to keep yourself in balance, just to keep the world from running you plumb crazy.”
Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
Eventually I will get into the back story on why I tried to kill myself, but not today, not up to going through the last 5 years (well really, 45 years) in detail just yet. However, I would like to share my opinion on suicide, […]
Let’s just say, the last six years of my life haven’t been easy.. and now I’m at a point in life where I’m starting to struggle. When I was fourteen, I lost my mum to cancer, and that was when my world started to come crashing down. I went off the rails.. I spent all of my time drinking, taking drugs, trying to shut everything out and for a while it worked. That was until my brother got ill, since we’d lost mum, he was severely depressed and wouldn’t leave the house. He started to act strange and had a few episodes in which he […]