I don’t know why I am so alone in every way, well actually I suppose I do, it’s just that I have been repressing it for far too long- out it comes now, oh dear:
The people who tell you that things change when people grow up and you go from lower to higher schools and onwards are not always right. People might change, but their attitudes towards those who were once 11 year old outcasts remains… and even if it isn’t verbalised, hostility is an emotion easy to pick up on when directed at you, it truly is. Do you know what it’s like […]
When I saw the words ‘someday, all this pain will be worthwhile’ one time, then many other times on countless blogs, I would just shake my head, and silently disagree that my sadness would come to nothing, except perhaps recovery, then more nothing. But I recently realised that my pain has helped one aspect of my life: I am writing again. And what I am writing is good. Sure, it’s just a few very short and broken stories with loose plots and screwed up people, but that’s okay. Because what I’ve written is good. It’s not happy, but it is real and I’m pleased with […]
I don’t concern myself with mindless details. The world is supposed to be this place where you can be yourself. Yet I’m stuck following the rules. The path they laid down for me. Why can’t I break from that. There is nothing wrong with me, I am fine. I am healthy, happy. So why am I just so desperate for this to be over. Is there really a point? My actions have yet to save a single person. But every person who I “fix” (these are the ungrateful ones, not the ones who become family and help you, no; these are the ones who steal […]
A poem/song that I wrote 3 days before being admitted into a hospital for a suicide attempt.
I can’t even function
I mean there’s no reason
Why try for no cause?
Fuck everything, fuck it all
I give up
I can’t keep up
No motivation
To keep me going
I’ve tried so hard
Only to be let down
My heart’s broken into shards
I guess this is punishment
For having hopes high
While my feet were on the ground
My lips can’t crack a smile
My throat can’t muster a laugh
It’s been a long while
Since I’ve been put down this bad
I guess I had […]
Okay, well this is my story..
I’m quite young and I’m broken. I’m depressed and suicidal, clearly.. and i selfharm. I put on the fakest smile every single day. I’m miserable, I just want to be dead, to be free, to be happy. I have tried to take my own life many times, I don’t really have a massive story. But my depression has taken over me, my self eestem is horrible, I can’t leave the house without crying, I’m horribly fat and aswell so ugly. I hate leaving the house because I usually don’t have the nicest clothes because i’m not rich, my family struggles […]
When i was little, i started to cut myself. mind you, im only 15 now. My counsler used to ask me if i could set a goal to live ..like live to christmas or my next birthday. and i did just that. I never knew it wasnt normal to think about suicide. i think about it maybe twice a week. My mom told me one time that i was a coward for wanting to kill myself, they think i just want attention, its not. i want relief. and its sad to say i think suicide is my only way out. I’ve tried before, i took […]
I might be clinically depressed or bipolar. I’ve been “sad” for 4 years now (if that means anything). I’ve taken classes in highschool and in my 2 and a half years of college and feel I might be, but that doesn’t change the way I feel. I do not want to be here. I want to leave and never come back. I want to go far away where no one knows me. When my own family found out I tried to kill myself, they made it worse. They cried and it only made me feel worse about myself. I tried letting someone in and talk […]
my life isn’t that bad. not anymore at least. I was raped by someone very close to me. almost every night in 4th grade. other than that, i dont know whats wrong with me. yeah, i get bullied. but not to my face. maybe that makes it hurt more. i know my family and boyfriend love me. but i cant stop thinking and planning my death. im giving myself a month. a month to see if things ever actually do get better. ive been depressed since sixth grade. cutting used to help, but it doesnt anymore. i dont have any escape from my mind. im […]
Even though I think that it is ok for me  if I wanna die right now, the idea of someone else committing suicide makes me feel so sad!!
Sometimes, I just think about one of my old friends and how close we used to be. She was my best friend and we did so many things together. She was a very shy person and wasn’t one to talk openly to people. I knew her since childhood and we were friends in the past but up until my Freshmen year of High School, we had drifted apart from one another.
We soon became close friends again. And part of the reason being that at that time I had a very small group of friends. I was awkward in Middle School and seemed to rarely speak […]
I feel so alone. I feel so lost. I feel so alone that I feel like I already died and everyone didn’t know or just didn’t care. I want to give up so bad. I can’t concentrate anymore. Words go past me and kinda jumble up in my mind. My hands shake because I always want to cry. Everyone’s gone. They all left. They’re all ghosts. Whenever I try to speak to someone, they ignore me. Or they’d look at me and roll their eyes. I used to be one of those popular girls. Everyone was my friend or wanted to be my friend. And […]
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you […]
I rarely go to sleep before 2 AM most nights. I usually just read, or write, or use my laptop until I get so exhausted I go straight to sleep when I let myself. I do this because otherwise, I lie awake in bed for hours and hours thinking dark, sad, terrifying thoughts and everything gets worse. And I can’t tell my parents that that’s the reason I’m always so exhausted in the mornings, because they tell me to just go to bed earlier, but they don’t get that the longer I lie in silence, the more time I have to think. And thinking too […]
I need everyone who is feeling bad, terrible, down, lonely, worthless, hopeless, unimportant, to take one minute from your life and think.
Think how beautiful the world is, because of your excistence. Think how much you’ve helped the others who were feeling bad, by posting your own stories. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! All of us here are just like one family. The same things, the same problems, the same stories.
Just think one minute; if not for God, you wouldn’t be here right now, reading this.
You’re God’s creature, He looks at you, and loves you even though you’re not perfect. I am not perfect. […]
What the hell is wrong with me? Am I an unlikable person? *sigh* I try you know I try to be friendly but why is it that in whatever I do Im just ignored. Im currently in art school and I try. try hard and I am decent at what I do yet I get no attention in any thing its like Im invisible and it just makes me hate everyone at school.school I HATE that too I enjoy the learning yes BUT I HATE THE PEOPLE THERE …I just hate people in general ? I didnt use to be like this I wasnt so […]
Before you decide to take your life, imagine who will find you. Imagine them walking into a room, and seeing you just hanging there. Whether it be your little sister, little brother, mother father, grandparents, a friend. Imagine what will happen when they find you. No, they will not say “Finally, they’re gone.†No, they will not say “I’m happy they did that.†No, they will not say “I never loved them anyways.†They will die. Their hearts will break. They will hurt, more than you ever […]
i’m fucked up and no one seems to notice. i’m sad and non one seems to notice. i’m disappearing and no one seems to notice. i’m dying and no one seems to notice. i’m falling apart and no one seems to notice… this is how i feel. </3
I can’t do it anymore I’m only 14 a girl can only take so much I wish the last time I tried killing myself worked I have noone to talk to so here I am and still people won’t probly care sadly being raped by your father and friend for years and finally getting away and now your stepdad is a creep also is hard for me I try to be a good person and help a lot of people but I have no one but my boyfriend that’s not enough for me I miss my sisters I can’t see them because my family on […]
I’m 26. Bipolar, student, mom. When I was a teenager my father shot himself and survived(thankfully) in our home. Every since that day my life change forever. I wasn’t the happy girl anymore. I thought as I got older things would get better, but my husband recently left us. I was abused in just about every way, but I am beyond sad over this loss. I constantly think about death and suicide. I also feel like a horrible parent. I wanted nothing more than to have a happy family for my son, but our home life was a nightmare. But now I have no one […]
Bieng Bi-Polar is hard for my young friend Gwen not many people understand her like I do.Its hard to have your over at my house and currently were dating which is also complicated. One day in the morning she said that she was going to die today being bi-polar I thought it would blow over but I never thought I would be in for such a big treat Room 224 2nd hour Mrs.**** she hated us that teacher did she would pick on me cause I was the jokester and Gwen hated it she stood up for me and got in trouble I always thanked […]