Tag:

So

Memories

by synthaxe 10/13/2014

written by synthaxe

Sew this up with threads of reason and regret
So I will not forget. I will not forget
How this felt one year six months ago
I know I cannot forget. I cannot forget

I’m falling into memories of you and things we used to do
Follow me there
A beautiful somewhere
A place that I can share with you

I can tell that you don’t know me anymore
It’s easy to forget, sometimes we just forget
And being on this road is anything but sure
Maybe we’ll forget, I hope we don’t forget

I’m falling into memories of you and things we used to do
Follow me […]

10/13/2014 0 comment

Indeed The Exi

by Bisban 10/10/2014

written by Bisban

The chaos of hell

I am hell-bent not hell’s bent

Nobody, nobody

I’m so sorry

So hard, keeps falling

Here, nobody here

I am the only

That lost

But I know

Lone until the next saga

I versus the apocalypse

It’s just me, homie.

10/10/2014 8 comments

last song you’ll listen to?

by death bunny 9/30/2014

written by death bunny

I posted this question long ago and eventually deleted it.
So, what is the last song you’re planning to listen to before you die? Or, if you have a playlist feel free to share.

9/30/2014 9 comments

Seems like I have a very bright future ahead of me.

by Sparkle Dolls 9/20/2014

written by Sparkle Dolls

Things have turned around lately. My life has done a complete 180. It’s great.

So why do I still want to die.

9/20/2014 11 comments

Well… a shit day….

by Still Lost 9/17/2014

written by Still Lost

So… I woke up and intended to kill myself today. I decided to give it one last shot with my MD who abandoned me. I sent her a text asking if there was a bed available at her hospital. That I was serious and was very genuinely asking for her help. Nothing provocative. Well, I had text her a bunch over the past few weeks asking when we can meet soon. Nothing provocative. But she wasn’t responding which was unusual so it created more distressed for me. Note: For those of you who haven’t read my posts, I have been through tons of treatment (ECT, […]

9/17/2014 9 comments

I just woke up. im crying merely because im still alive.

by cagedtiger 9/10/2014

written by cagedtiger

How pathetic is that? I’m just in SO much pain, I can’t imagine how much longer I can survive to exist feeling this much excruciating pain. I just took a bunch of pills (to sleep) so here’s hoping they work. I cannot stand to endure this terrible level of pain much longer.

9/10/2014 3 comments

In line at the BMV

by kramdragon 9/1/2014

written by kramdragon

That’s what my life feels like. It’s that pathetic. The people I want to talk to are all there in front of me, but they’re not looking back to see me reaching out for them. I want to think that there are people behind me that would listen, but I can’t turn back to see for sure. Every once in a while the line moves enough that I get to talk to a perfect stranger, but they can’t help. So what else is there to do but go to the back of the line?

9/1/2014 0 comment

The end is near

by patsycline 8/30/2014

written by patsycline

I tried on Tuesday. Failed. Will not fail this weekend. No energy right now. Waiting for SO to go out so i can go out alone and do what has to be done. My therapist gave me a crisis line, lol. Like I would call. I don’t think so. I’ve done so in the past, jsut feel silly. I’m done .

8/30/2014 11 comments

So.

by tctc 8/14/2014

written by tctc

You think you can tell Heaven from Hell?

8/14/2014 9 comments

So unhappy

by savemexo 8/11/2014

written by savemexo

If I can’t live a happy life, then I don’t want to live at all. I’m miserable, I don’t know how much longer I can wait to he happy.

8/11/2014 2 comments

The best Poem

by SadRabbit 8/9/2014

written by SadRabbit

I think a lot about killing myself. Not like a point on a map, but rather like a glowing exit sign at a show that’s never been quite bad enough to make me wanna leave. See, when I’m up I don’t kill myself because holy shit- there is SO much left to do. And when I’m down I don’t kill myself because then the sadness would be over, and the sadness is my old paint under the new. The sadness is the house fire or the broken shoulder, I’d still be me without it, but I’d be so boring. – Neil Hilborn, “The Future”

8/9/2014 0 comment

by lostchild445 8/3/2014

written by lostchild445

Sometimes I wonder
Is there really a future for me
I look back on all my history
and decide its not to be

Years of pain and struggle and strife
Multiple attempts to end my life
Failure upon failure and disappointment too
Not to mention the drugs and alcohol to boot

But people still say
Every dog has his day
Yet somehow its hard to wait for what may be

When will this day come?
It’s been plenty of moons
since the times I could stay home and watch cartoons
and be content

So much has changed yet so much has not
I feel like I went full circle, […]

8/3/2014 2 comments

The night is coming

by misanthrope 8/1/2014

written by misanthrope

Unknown,unremarkable,underground
She use to shine,now abyss
Soul killing loneliness
The desolation of the condemned
Even in this desert she canot love herself
The end is coming,but first she must burn
The ecstasy of love now a stabbing memory
You got your chance,you did not hold him close
Youve ruined everything you ever loved
Your disregard,your demands
Youre a killer,a destroyer
So many conversations,you told your story
So many times that it seemed true
You keep forgetting the lie is still inside you
It squirms,it sickens,it must be let out
Kicking and screaming,no graceful exit
Explosive decompression
Theres nothing left to burn,nor bury
Youre a casualty of yourself
Pulled apart,you must wait here alone
Night is coming and I promise you sleep
Night is coming

8/1/2014 1 comment

“Away From The Sun”

by bigjamdaddy 7/25/2014

written by bigjamdaddy

“Away From The Sun”
by 3 Doors Down

It’s down to this
I’ve got to make this life make sense
Can anyone tell what I’ve done
I miss the life
I miss the colours of the world
Can anyone tell where I am

‘Cause now again I’ve found myself
So far down, away from the sun
That shines into the darkest place
I’m so far down, away from the sun again
Away from the sun again

I’m over this
I’m tired of living in the dark
Can anyone see me down here
The feeling’s gone
There’s nothing left to lift me up
Back into the world I […]

7/25/2014 1 comment

How Bad Is “Hospitalization”

by Dallas 7/18/2014

written by Dallas

Got a new shrink who says I should consider in-patient treatment.

Seriously don’t want to.

Any clue from anyone who has been down that path would be helpful.

So, if you’ve ever voluntarily gone, what was your typical day like?

7/18/2014 17 comments

So lonesome I could cry

by Dollycutter 7/18/2014

written by Dollycutter

I can’t trust anyone, not even myself. This feeling unsettles me and my world is built on quicksand.

I couldn’t even stay home by myself earlier because I know there is danger in the silence. My brain explores every unsavory character flaw I possess. I hate being this way. I can’t help but tongue the wounds and look for new ones.

I don’t want to die. At least I don’t think I do. Maybe I’m wrong. Sometimes I know I need to though. Lately there’s a lot of knowing. Like right now. I stare at my daughter and I know she deserves better than […]

7/18/2014 2 comments

Solace In Time

by BoyofChagrin 7/14/2014

written by BoyofChagrin

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

Tell me what keeps you awake at night?

7/14/2014 0 comment

So many attempts – So hard to die

by dancebackthesea 7/12/2014

written by dancebackthesea

In my over 30 years of being chronically suicidal and depressed, I’ve tried drowning myself by swimming out far into the ocean until I became exhausted (but I was “saved” by fishermen, though they had a bit of difficulty landing me in the boat, because I fought like hell). I’ve tried poisons, and massive doses of acetomenophen and morphine (put me in a coma for a while). I’ve tried cabon monoxide poisoning by charcoal (but my only neighbors came home unexpectedly, returning early from […]

7/12/2014 17 comments

Darkenss

by DarkAngel21 7/8/2014

written by DarkAngel21

Im screaming

Darkness is consuming me

No one hears my cries

“Your fat”

“Your ugly”

“No one loves you”

“Your a mistake”

I cover my ears

Shut my eyes

Trying to draw away the voice

“No that’s not true!”

I would yell at the voice

“My family, My friends, My boyfriend LOVE ME”

I scream in agony

“Its pity love,

Family are supposed to love you ,

Your friends wear a mask,

You boyfriend doesn’t want to hurt you”

I slowly opened my eyes

I saw a shadowy figure stand before me

Black as night

Embrace me

It whispered

“Shhhhh, im here for you”

I slowly open my eyes and look at it

It kisses me

I feel all my emotions go into that kiss

It looks at me with a satisfied expression

“The contract […]

7/8/2014 0 comment

Vanquish Pain

by AltoidRanger 7/7/2014

written by AltoidRanger

Forcefully Finding Fickle Fables

Being governed by our cables

We glutch what is given

Not knowing we’re being driven

Constantly Crippled Controlled Constricted

This the life you depicted?

So easy to to influence

Your mind is promiscuous

Diligently Drudging Docile Drone

They try to overthrow your thrown!

Grab life by the throat

Cut it open, then gloat

Vivified Valorous Venom Victim

Torn the leach from your cerebellum

You should be proud

Go ahead, you’re allowed

7/7/2014 0 comment

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