Tonight is going to be hard. I stayed the past two nights at my moms best friends house who is considered my “Aunt” so I call her my aunt and her brother and sister in law came over for the first time in years along with both their sons. Me and her nephew, Brandon used to have a this thing together not a relationship but just a closeness and I haven’t seen him in 3 years. I had 24 hour with him and those 24 hours are going to effect me for the rest of the week and maybe even more. He is the first […]
Tag:
someone
Why are boys so stupid? For all the guys reading this, I would love for you to explain it to me. I have possibly fallen head over heels for someone, and they have no clue. They don’t even like to talk to me. Maybe I’m the stupid one. Eh, it’s probably him. Anyone, if anyone has an idea why they are so dangerously stupid, I would so like to hear it. Thanks for your totally not suicidal related help. Sorry for this post, it will probably be deleted in a little while.
I absorb negative emotions so quickly and frequently. I don’t even have any reason to be upset at life. I’m just physically drained all the time.
I remember back in high school and earlier, I was always bright and full of life etc, but HS just ruined me. That’s not to say I had a rough time through it, I’m an average dude, had friends and did okay on subjects. But I was always invested in the idea of having a partner. Having someone to love and care for. And that want has slowly been stripped back piece by piece and I just don’t even try […]
My sister happened to discover the brilliance of creating art on our skin. She had danced her paintbrush across the canvas, creating a crimson stain, a promised scar awaiting the near future. I know she had to have learned them from somewhere. From someone. The saying “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” has never held such a deep meaning before. She learned it from me. Her big sis. And why don’t I feel guilty for not teaching her the harsh and damaging effects of self damage? Why don’t I feel guilty that she has to conceal her wounds until further notice? I think […]
I’m realizing now; just how many issues I really have. My dad has severed any bond we had built over the past few years. The bond that was so fragile after years of abuse and death threats. He became enraged over a mistake I made that did not affect him. Now, I’ve no family. But I don’t understand why this is affecting me so much now. I’ve never been loved or accepted by my family.
My mother used me as a servant and emotionally manipulated me to do her bidding. My father constantly threatened to murder me and would constantly degrade me. This is your typical […]
i’m recovering. I’m recovering from self harm, and have attempted suicide twice. I’ve been clean for a while. I’m trying so hard. Life just seems to be getting worse and worse. Everywhere I go, I feel so mad and sad and I just want to explode. I’m tired of being hurt. All these people fuck me over. I hate it so much. Is there any true people out there? I’d love to meet someone genuine. Someone who isn’t fake and someone who’s not a liar. Just a true person. I’m so tired of being hurt. I’m trying so hard at school. I’m trying to find […]
School is managed to turn me from someone willing to learn and grow into a person with bleak eyes who memorises facts only to be tested on them. It has managed to turn me into a person who perceives death and expulsion as the same thing.
Thinking of staying around for a wee bit I’ve got a few natural health supplements helping my illness. I won’t say what though. Had a good day well pretty much. Thinking I have work on the brain if a company can or are willing to accept and employ someone who’s been unwell
It never fails to amaze me how incredibly rude and dismissive some doctors and nurses are. Why if someone is struggling with depression would you seek help from someone that talks down to you and treats you like crap? I wonder how many people have killed themselves after going to the wrong doctor or because a nurse acted like a hateful judgemental asshole…
I fully give up in finding housing. There’s absolutely no place for me in this world. I’m completely fucking useless and a throw away of society with a computer degree, (almost) film degree, and IQ of 137. It all means nothing. Homeless and transgender, physical disabilities and failing health due to homelessness and lack of sleep. No one gives a fuck and there is no help. No one wants to live with someone obese. No one wants to live with someone over the age of 30. No one will rent to someone with bad credit. No one will rent to someone who’s background check produces […]
Tool has one of the most intelligent lyrics of any band I ever heard. The lyrics that jump out to me the most is “why can’t we not be sober, just want to start this over, why can’t we drink forever”…..then the next line is “why can’t we sleep forever”. – I can totally relate. I wanna drink forever and wish I could sleep forever. It’s a song that can have many different meanings in accordance with people’s personal experiences. It’s deeper than drug or alcohol addiction – for me, I want to just go and sleep forever. Being sober hurts because of my mental […]
I feel like the only time I can be myself is when I comment on watpad and even then I feel like I’m not really wanted I’m like the 3rd wheel just like with my family never really wanted just delt with. I just someone to fight for me but
am I worth fighting for ?
So my cousin who I consider More of a friend and my friend from high school get along really well and we all hang out but now they are both in relationships and the 4 of them get along so well they are talking about double dates and I just left bcoz I have no1 and even if I did I don’t know how to be in a relationship or what love feels like the only example I have growing up is not 1 that I consider love and It is I don’t want it but I have also just lost the only 2 friends […]
It’s hard, being alone all the time. Even if I’m with someone physically I still feel alone.
I miss you but I must let you go. I loved you but i’ve found someone who is fixing my heart. When I see you in the hallways it takes all my strenth to not break down and cry. You seem okay, smiling and laughing. actually, You seem happier now that im gone but thats all I wanted for you. to be happy. I could never give you happiness all i cause is sadness and sorrow. You plead and beg for me not to leave you but I hear none of it as I turn around and walk away. I hear your crys […]
Hello, everyone.
I am a miserable person, I hate my life. I know nothing will ever be perfect for me. Pointless. I am nothing more than a catfish, ugly on the outside and ugly on the inside.
I can’t go anywhere, I can’t see anyone, I can’t do anything. I am so tired of being so despised.
Sometimes I think I can do this, I can live like a normal person, but I can’t.
Happiness is so fleeting.
I long for that little rush of adrenaline that comes from someone loving you, but when they find out who I am they always leave me. Even if I tell you too […]
Its midnight and I’m sitting outside asking myself “what makes me “beautiful”?” I asked my boyfriend and i will post his response down below along with my opinion on others not myself as examples. So my question for you guys is, what makes someone beautiful in your opinion?
His opinion: “Honestly I can say every physical attribute, you’re fine to a tee, your skin, hair and eyes, lips and nose, body, adorable and majestic is your physical appearance but your attitude and emotions, the way you act in certain situations, that’s a real beauty in itself, you’re so cute on the inside even if you […]
I dont know what this is. My heart is beating out of my chest. I’m having a fucking PANIC attack like you wouldnt believe. Someone talk to me. I’ve not felt this since I was 15. This is scary as fuck. Like all my worst realities are going to come to pass because I’m thinking them into existence type deal. That’s not the reality but definitely how i feel.
i need something to dream about..
something to do in the future
my family needs me to get out home one day…
oh god! i dont have where to go!
i dont have dreams or anything!!
there is someone that have a dream?
i just need something…
I think I might have made a post like this some time ago, but the last few months have been … odd, to understate the case. I have some facets, some core beliefs I’ve formed, that make me an impossible girl indeed.
1) I’m a grey ace. Grey asexual. I can feel some sexual desire, though largely when reading erotic fic or something, sometimes for someone I care about, but I don’t want sex. Romance, yes. Sex, no. It took me a very long time to accept that this doesn’t make me broken, it simply puts me on a different […]