At least I can make someone proud of me. It may not be you as a parent of me but it’s someone who acts more like a mother to me than you ever have. I’ve tried so hard for you to be proud of me and yet you’ve never said it. Soon I’m going to stop trying and give up but for now you still have a chance. I don’t know what else to do. So just so you know I’m done trying to please you I’m going to do everything in my own will to please the one person who acts like a mother […]
Tag:
stop
Today, once everyone leaves me alone, I think I’ll cut. Nobody ever took away my knife when they found out about my depression.
I though I would stop cutting, but I really feel very guilty for some reason. I feel like I smother her. If I didn’t dive in too deep with her, if I didn’t fall so deeply into love with her, maybe she would still care for me. It’s my fault.
I am in dispare i dont know what to do i just want the pain to stop.
Why do I even try to befriend people?
Why do I even try my best to feel loved?
Why do I even try to find people who might care for me?
Why do I even try to hope that someday I will find love?
Why do I even try to stop myself from thinking about suicide?
All I do when I befriend people is hurt them.
All I do when I try to feel loved is get hurt.
All I do when I try to find people who might care for me is to feel useless and unwanted.
All I do when I try to hope […]
I don’t think I can do it anymore.
I’m tired. I’m so tired. Of fighting myself, of struggling, of not sleeping, of my thoughts, of the loudness, of the pain, of the medication.
I just wish that my brain would be quiet. It’s too loud. Everything hurts.
please
make it stop
I’m seriously thinking about suicide too often now. When I’m walking to school from the bus stop, its dark and I think about running in front of a car. And when I get in the school, I think about jumping off the side of the stairs. When I’m home, I plan on overdosing or hanging myself from the hook on my bedroom roof…
Today I started to cut. It feels like the right thing to do. I was going to do it on my arms but I decided to do it on my hip instead. The pain is bad but the cuts are good, though I feel like a mess. I keep shaking every time it think about self harm, it’s like the shakes you have when you’re cold, they’re hard to stop. My hip is badly hurting now. I’ve had racial comments made at me today. Some by my “friends’” boyfriend, but her and all her friends that were supposed to me my friends are sticking up […]
Last week was particularly bad, and I had repeated thoughts about suicide–after many months of not having those thoughts.
Then on Sunday I was much better. Â I gave my oldest daughter a special gift. Â I had my Rolex readjusted so that it fit her. Â I got so much joy watching her wear it. Â I’ve always told her that she could have it as an heirloom when I died, but I wanted the chance to watch her enjoy it. Â I was so happy about giving it to her. Â Yesterday, I was in a board meeting for a charity I serve on and got two nice compliments. […]
No one knows and no one can see. I cant cry anymore only gag and rock myself until I stop moaning the pain away. Its silly how we can fall so rapidly and just realize this once we have the pills and alcohol at the ready. How did it come to this? “I just want you to get better so you can stop hurting everyone else.” he said. Why did he say it? They sent me somewhere where I was supposed to get better. I said it made me better. In reality they blew my head off. Its terrible thing, lying. What can I do […]
I panic so much because of how I feel inside. My girlfriend wants me to get better but I cant right now. I know I should be happy with where I am in my life but everything that’s going on in my mind won’t let me.
I want her to get mad at me and tell me im wrong for not wanting to be here because if i leave this world ill be leaving her behind. one of my only reasons for being here is her because she wants me to. if she told me to kill myself tonight i would think about it for two […]
I’m wanting my pills again. I know where I can get some too… I’m craving them. Badly. I obviously haven’t and won’t stop cutting. I just I don’t know. I know it’s not good but I ant them so bad.
Hi Guys,
How are you? How’s your life? How is your day? Don’t forget to comment down below how you are! I do want to know!
NOTE: Really sorry for this being a long post… I didn’t really try to… Writing is the only way I can get my feelings out.
How am I? Does it even matter how I am? Does it matter? Maybe it does. Maybe it doesn’t. How am I? Physically? Sore. Bruised. Hurt. Scarred. Mentally? Broken. In Pain. Hurt. Scared.
My physical state… I keep getting headaches… Waking up this morning I hit my head on my wall and it hurt like crazy, but […]
I just want to slit my wrists I want to so bad..it’s killing me I have so many thoughts racing through my mind. I just want us to work out you know I want these thoughts to stop I’m close to being done again
Kawaii: “Every species pollutes, but only one species tries to stop it. Every species gets sick, but only one can figure out why and stop it. We can’t run very fast, yet we are the fastest living things on the planet. We’re not very strong, yet we can move mountains. We have no wings, yet we’ve flown higher than any animal can imagine. Our voices aren’t very loud, yet we can talk to our brothers on the other side of the planet, even further than that. I have seen more than the keenest of hawks, gone faster than the quickest of all cheetahs, moved more […]
so I found this website and it hopes of finding people that will understand me.. So I’m assuming this is my place..
to be honest, I don’t know what’s getting into me . I feel like a monster. I made my mother cry after she found out I self harm, and now that I stop self harming, me and my boyfriend have been getting into countless fights… My mom still puts me down. She calls me whore, slut, only because I’ve kissed one guy. She beats me for no reason too. It doesn’t stop and I know it won’t. I feel so useless and I feel […]
I don’t know what to do anymore. I hate my life. I hate this world. We’re so fucked up. In the way that people are. The way we act, the way we have to live. I just don’t know if I can be a part of it anymore. And I don’t know if I’ll make it to the end of the week.
I just wanted to get better. To get these things out of my head. To stop seeing things, to stop hearing things. To stop hurting myself and everyone else. To know what’s real and what’re not. But everything’s just gotten worse. […]
This is my tribute to bullying. There are SO MANY kids out there getting bullied. And what are we doing to stop it? Nothing. Stand up for once. Be yourself. Stop being fakes. And start caring. WE can only change this world. It’s not going to magically happen. So live in the moment. Don’t bully. Be you. And stand out. You were born to be YOU. Not someone else. You weren’t born to be bullied or to be a bully, just you. So what if you were born ‘weird’, an ‘outcast’, or ‘nerdy’. It’s you. You can’t change who you were supposed to be. […]
I’d like anyone reading this to take note of every word I write.
I’m furious.
I’m nearly murderous.
I’m hateful.
I’m blackening in my rage.
My thoughts would scour your minds clean,
Leaving you incapacitated, searching for answers.
The truth is, I’m sad and lonely, just like all of you.
But unlike the majority of you, I choose to unleash my sadness in a glorious rage.
I don’t take drugs,
I don’t cut myself,
I don’t starve myself,
I am better than that.
I choose to be furious and attack everything with the ferocity and indignation that only true insanity can grant…
And there is a distinct possibility […]
I dont want to die. I dont want to live. I’m terrified of it all. I’m conflicted, i’m incomplete and I’m suffocating with this desperate need to be loved and yet I do not trust or accept a single persons love.
How do you live when youve lost the desire to live but are haunted by the things you need??
How do you live with emotions that were never tended to.. such important steps that were ignored. I’m in pain and i’m empty. I am exhausted of this world. I’m 20 years old, 21 in march. I’m a light skinned female with, ive been told, attractive lips, […]
why stop me? why do you care? why can’t i just go? why?