Sums up how I feel in a short poem I wrote. Not so good at expression any other way.
I belong to theory. Followers belong to practice. I tried to combine both but nothing worked and i don’t know why.
I walked last night on the cliffs, facing the Pacific Ocean. Alone. It was very late; nearly 2am. There was a mild mist coming from the ocean. The ocean before me was so vast, that you can’t but still your mind and feel the nothingness. Had I taken a boat, and sailed straight forward (as the crow flies), I would have possibly ended up in Queensland.
Then you equate the ocean with the eternity. Of course, it’s only a fallacy, as nothing is eternal. One day even this vast ocean will come to its end. But it’s a melancholic thought nonetheless, when humans do that […]
This is a sort of rant ramble of things, and also a call of advice.
I’ve never been too good with words. I always manage to say the wrong thing when I’m speaking face to face with someone, and I also get very emotional too even over things that don’t need to be. So in general hard to discuss topics for me are even harder, and I’m sure I’m not the only one on this board.
So now onto the general main topic.
I’m moving to California, I’m just leaving everything behind and moving, there’s no doubt in my mind about it. I have to go for myself. […]
Have you ever had a moment where you’re just thinking, not about anything in particular.. and those innocent thoughts take a nasty turn? Next thing you know you’re talking yourself out of hurting yourself. Moments of insanity I like to call them. When something in your head shifts ever so slightly and everything you’ve stuffed and hidden inside for twenty years tries to get out? It over loads the brain and you just want to make it stop. You’d do anything for the memories and the pain to leave.
I’ve never been able to fully tell anyone the whole story. Why not a bunch of random […]
This sums my mood this morning. I was quite happy before going to bed. I hate how my mood changes so fast for basically no reason.
I’m a 26 year old male, depressed, chronic procrastinator, without any sense of meaning in my life. I hate the world we live in, so much is wrong, greed over morality pretty much sums up most of it, and an ignorance is bliss lifestyle the rest. But that’s the normal QQ; here’s were it gets really pathetic. I hate myself most of all, everyday I wake up and cuss at myself until I can finally summon up the will to get out of bed and face another day of my life. I have nothing, and I know it’s no one’s fault but my own; I […]
DESCENT:
Falling victim from neglect
Designed thoughts and intellect
Forgotten and displaced
The crux of my dismay
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How deep I descend?
Deeper into this abyss
Weighted down and sinking fast
Life did not offer me
More than false destiny
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How deep I descend?
I am nothing
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
Nothing…
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How […]