My mind won’t focus on anything but suicide. Everyday I envision the multiple easy ways I could end it. I don’t only think about them, I visualize them. Like mini hallucinations. I’m terrified of what my brain is doing to me. Should I check myself in somewhere?
Anyone who says suicide is a choice is full of shit. Suicide is a battle, one you only hope you’ll survive.
All advice is welcome, and yes, I’m medicated.
After 9 years of thinking about suicide every day (first time I ever thought about it I was about 9, I’m now 22) I finally decided to let everyone know. In October I texted my mother & husband about it. My husband’s response was an atypical caring one, “just hold on” “you’re strong” “you can make it.” “we’ll survive together” etc. You know the garbage anyone spews at someone who comes forward professing their suicidal thoughts. My mother however took the atypical rude approach, “so many people have it so much worse” “you have no idea what it’s really like to struggle” “you’re life has […]
i’ve done amazing things in my life, had some incredible experiences. most of my life was as a professional creative… now.. 17 days left. I tried once in ’97 didn’t expect to wake up…
i won’t make that mistake again… i hope.
so much anguish..i gave it a year then another year and another now i have lost every thing.. or about to. betrayed and lied to. a job so miserable i almost pull my hair out to survive a bad call.. i used to earn $72 an hour and that was low for what i did .. and now . its humiliation and abuse i abide […]
I have been cutting for about three months now. I cut my wrists, legs and stomach. I have been very good at hiding them, at least I thinks so, but now I have a problem. I’m sick therefore not going to school and left alone at home for the day. My mom’s friend is a doctor and my mom asked her to come over and check upon me, find out why I’m sick and how to recover. I’m so scared that the doctor is going to make me undress, because I’ve been to doctors loads of times before I started self harming and many times […]
I don’t have an NDE (near death experience) story to share. But I’m wondering if anyone has one to share. Did you survive a suicide attempt, and have an NDE? Tell me about it. I’d like to hear your story. Bright lights, did you go to heaven, or hell???? Tell me about your NDE!
I’m sick. Had an appt. with the surgeon today. Blah blah blah, more tests, blah blah blah.
Just ended a 10 year relationship. He didn’t want to marry me. Or live with me. Or commit to me in any meaningful way.
I want to feel better. I want to go on with my life and get medical treatment and be okay. I really do.
I just don’t think I have the strength to survive the pain I’ll have to go thru to come out the other end. Mental pain physical pain. All of it.
Maybe I’m a coward. Maybe I’m just broken and exhausted.
Suicide […]
I’m 27. I’ve been depressed since I was a teenager and quit high school when I was 17. I’ve been dealing with anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts ever since. I’ve lived many years as a hermit, then started going to therapy and I was institutionalized for a year. Then last year, when I had turned 26, I was done with therapy and I needed to take the next step, so I went back to school. I don’t have any diploma’s, noone is going to hire me (nor am I ready for a job), so school it was.
I do everything for you. You do nothing for me. You have come to expect me to drop everything and do whatever you ask. you’re a grown man…act it . Be responsible for your own shit. It’s all about poor you…you’ve destroyed me in your path. I have to get out from under you in order to survive. If you are there in the end things will be different but I have my suspicions that you will be long gone, when the favors stop.
I often wonder how we can be so alone in this overpopulated world??? Such a sad existence once you survive the unsurvivable! Everyone/everything you once knew continues on like you were never there. We are so insignificant alone!!! 1 more day closer to the end, so curious to see what happens yet so reluctant. Goodnight world!!!
It hurts so much to see what you’re all going through and what you have been through. If I could, I’d take all of your pain on my own shoulders. I’d not survive it but I would rather my own suffering than all of yours. I’m not the crying type of person but this honestly brings tears to my eyes. Especially knowing that I’m useless in helping anyone with their problems. But if anyone wants to share their burden, I’m here.
My demons creep back into my room and rip me to shreds…. Leave me with tears, scars, and blood dripping from my legs…. Who cares though right? I mean that’s how I live life everyday… With the people around me.. Who say they’ll stay?
I mean they said it’d be okay.. But honestly this “okay” feeling has yet to come.. So here I am once again putting on the same mask to hide my true expression.
Though I may smile it doesn’t mean I feel how I look… Looks can be deceiving.. And one might say that I’m a master of deception. I scream for […]
I often find it humorous how people say that suicide is permanent solution to “temporary problem” when life itself is merely temporary. Everything you do, every objective you attempt to accomplish, absolutely everything you do in life will mean nothing when you die. This is the joke of life. You spend your entire life setting all of these arbitrary goals and objectives to achieve, and yet it means nothing. Most humans simply survive to survive, which is meaningless in itself. Why do you survive to survive? What is the point of simply continuing to exist for the sake of the continuation of existence when you […]
Why is it when people are happy
there are people who are sad?
why is there opposite happy and sad?
Why are there evil in the world?
Why cant i change?
why cant i be
why cant i be
why cant i be…
straight
why do i have to be bi?
why cant i change?
i cant survive… Im nog strong enough
im chrishton
A bisexual chrishton
well please help
please
please…..
-brian
p.s im 13 year old boy
I planned to go tonight. I have the pills ready. I honestly don’t know if I will or not. I had a partner last summer, we got ready together. She drove to my place (where I live with my mother in the middle of nowhere) to pick me up and we cuddled all night and talked and watched her favorite show. But on the day it was to happen, I backed out. She didn’t and sure enough her obituary showed up on the internet and her friends posted messages about her. She was part of a community who really misses her. I only have a […]
one must compare. Human life is evolved in a way we must compare to survive in the system
lets do it
1. Happyness- Rich people, Rich kids, unconcious people
2. Sadness- homeless, handicapped, slavery jobs
3. Lifestyle- if you satisfied with your lifestyle what about Obama, bill gates
4. Money- Warren buffet, Larry Ellison
5. Achievements- mark zuckerberg
6. Glamour- Justin bieber
What driving us to live a life?
if you know you are not even comparable to any of above people
Im strung out on coke and weed. And all I can think of is that one day when I survived. I think about it everyday and wonder what I did wrong to have to survive in this world. I literally have everything yet I feel like I have nothing. I just want the pain to go away.
I hate living life and I just want to die. But I don`t know how to effectively kill myself without fucking it up. I cannot mentally survive. This game of life is not for me. It`s torture! I don`t understand why we are not allowed to legally kill ourselves with help when we don`t want to live anymore. Fuck!. What`s the point of keeping people who are clearly unfit to live, who cannot function, alive? Fucking cruel. This life. This earth. Is hell. It`s a prison. It really is. I don`t understand any of it. Don`t want to participate in it. Why can`t we get […]
As a mmo gamer I find myself tragically stuck in the role of tank. I can’t help but feel life beats on me a little more than others. It is selfish to think that way, because everyone is fighting their own battles, playing their own parts, but sadly I think I am just to perfectly fitted to this part. My nature is to protect, to take the first hit, the last, and each one in between. I feel like I care far too much to fit in properly in this day and age. The only thing I want is to help people smile, and to […]
My name is Abhishek, I’m 23 years old. My parents are abusing me everyday and everytime. No matter how much I try to avoid them, they just find a way to put me down. They want me to die. I haven’t done anything wrong, I’m just a guy who helps others and this is what I got for my goodness. I had a girlfriend but I have to leave her because of my parents. I’m lonely and I have nobody to share my pain. I want to cry but I stop myself thinking that I must become stronger in order to survive. But now I […]
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