poison in my mouth
Tastes like tar and notebook paper and Prozac and mint gum and sweat and blood and tears
Tag:
Tastes
She seems harmless enough, has the same problems as me, suicidal the same kind of tastes and personality but she is fragile and vulnerable to a point that exceeds my own, so i wonder……would it be such a terrible thing to be with her, would we crumble and end up destroying ourselves because we couldn’t handle each others sadness and attempts, would this relationship be a bad thing?
would we be harmless or harmful together, i do not yet know, i feel as though when meds come i will get better and she may too and then we could conquer this hard part of life together […]
Everywhere I go, every place I look, I see people. I see love; I see happiness. I see what could be best described as a form of ignorant euphoria. Guys strut through the malls with their girlfriends, people just sort of hang out around places. Fuck. I don’t know. I don’t think I’ll ever know. What I do know is that I am feeling a sort of pain that cannot be rectified, minimised, or mitigated, due to its constant presence.
I will never experience love beyond that of my few friends, or that of my parents.
To be perfectly honest, I’m tired of my parents, particularly my […]
im an outcast. i wish i was normal, i wish i wasnt this broken. maybe they’d like me then. maybe i’d be accepted. but it wont happen. i dont know how to fight the demons in my head and i have no energy left to do so. where my heart should be,its empty. if you look close enough,in every picture of mine,my eyes just look dead. they are dead. arent they the windows to your soul.
im completing the process; the date’s may 24th. its a friday. noone will know,probably. this time it will work, i have everything i need im sure its enough to […]
I’ve done it.I think I finaly got rid of the only two “friends” that still talked to me.I kept rejecting their proposal to hang out.It’s been about 2 weeks that I haven’t seen them.
No more stupid talk
No more going along those stupid talk
No more people trying to change me at all cost
No more fake smile
I am 100% alone now.
Man it just feels so stupid to write this for everyone to see.I wish I could burn my mask but I’m too much of a coward to do so.I’ve goten so affraid of being rejected by people that I’ll surely use it forever on…My mother started noticing […]
I always have such grand ideas for things to do during my lunch hour but I usually end up lazily browsing the national post website and wallowing in some self pity.
I would rather not have been born; I think all the time how I hate the various sensations that go along with occupying a living body. It’s all so draining, trying to find some level of contentment… I dunno.
I feel like, some time ago, I experienced heaven, but now I’m here. I’ve completely forgotten the experience of perfect happiness except for the lingering feeling that I’ve been better. I long for non-existence.