At this point I have been having thoughts of doing this for a week. I just can’t do it anymore. I haven’t been happy. I am so hurt and won’t ever be happy again. I am as low as a person can ever get and just keep getting hurt and cry all the time cuz nothing gets better. I already have all my goodbyes written and goodbye videos. I have my notes in place and I have no emotions anymore. I know how I am going to do this. And right now, it will be done tomorrow.
think
I don’t understand why people try to sugarcoat self harm & suicide. Just stop. Stop thinking of it as a beautiful tragedy or a ‘tiger who earned their stripes.’ It’s really annoying. OH, and my favorite is when people don’t care about you until something bad happens. Fuck everyone. I hate society, I really do. Back to the sugarcoating part. It’s almost like people like to encourage self harm. You think that people are proud of the things they do? Things like this? Wow. Get your shit together people. I am proud of people who fight against hate though, you walk around with scars showing? […]
One day Love and Friendship met.
Love asked”why do you exist when I already exist?”
Friendship smile and said”to put a smile where you leave tears”
what do you think?
Is it true/ beautiful?
Why do you think you are not a computer program running in another planet?
Ive been in this bed for almost a year. I cant seem to make myself go outside and be a normal person and have a life. Almost every day I think about killing myself since i am a burden to my family and boyfriend. I am unmotivated and have social anxiety i dont know what to do with my life or even know where to start. The George Washington bridge all ways seems to be calling to me and the only thing that keeps me from going over the edge is the fear of what if i survive and making everyone i care about sad. […]
Sitting here looking back at how I use to be, I can’t even remember what I was thinking.
Searching for razors in the cabinet, was like seeking treasure.Frustration running through my veins when I couldn’t find one and I had resorted myself to using a kitchen knife, later on hiding that knife. The feel of a sharp blade pressed against my skin, consciously aware that I’ll be dripping soon and the adrenaline rush. It was like an external use of drug. As I grazed my skin with the razor, my level of satisfaction increased and my care for the world and the people around me diminished. It […]
all i can think on my commute is, if i just step off the platform if i just jump in front of the train, my pain will go away. I’m too much of a coward to do that. i can’t stop tearing up at work, then i was out with my parents and started crying in front of everyone, they just thought i was sad to see my family friends move, sure i am extremely sad about that, but my sadness for myself is much worse. I’m completely miserable to the point i can’t take it anymore. i just want to scream and beg everyone […]
so i finally thought i overcame everything, but lately i felt the need to cut, i have cut out of desperation
i had an argument with a friend causing me and my partner to break up and causing her to break up with my friend,
things were said people where hurt and it hit me… i already felt dead inside… thoughts in my head “this is what you done, its your fault, your no good , everyone better of not knowing you” ect … so i went downstairs got a box of pills and took 24 paracetamols hoping id never wake up…
but here i am …. the […]
You could look at your family right now and judge them just by looking at them because no one knows their family better than a outsider. I’m the type of person who doesn’t talk much, but feels a lot. Keeps everything in and listens to others. Having parents who smoke weed and drink alcohol everyday, gives you a different look on things. You mature faster, but don’t make good decisions. I smoke weed and yet my parents tell me not to. They think I don’t know about it but actually I take their weed and call them hypocritical. I’ve cut myself and I’m not proud […]
Why do my days get worse and worse I never have anything good in my life ever and I never will. Any time I find something or someone that makes me happy it gets takin away from me. Why live my life everyday miserable and never actually live my life. Iv been alive for 22 years now but I never lived one day yet…. Why would I keep dealing with this? I have no one and nothing to live for. I’m meant to kill myself, I’m just too scared to like a coward I wish I can have the strength to just kill myself and […]
It’s the worst feeling in the world being blamed by your own mother for her stress. It hurts what doesn’t she think i have things going on to. That maybe i hide it so i don’t cause her more pain than i already have. Does she not think that maybe i just want a hug and to know that i can talk to her not just the blame every time i do something slightly wrong in her opinion.
Hi, so I just made this, found this website on tumblr. I wanted to tell you guys that I’m here for any of you not completely sure how this works I don’t think you can message people? if you can then feel free to message me or you can always kik me @autumnnwi or message me on tumblr can-i-be-your-barbie-girl . I’m not here to judge or make you feel worse about yourself, I myself have suicidal thoughts, I have cut myself (haven’t in 2 weeks), also have problems with my weight, and have anxiety. However I’m not really here for anyones pity or anything like […]
My struggle with depression/anxiety as well as coming from an abusive/chaotic home with a parent who had, at the time, undiagnosed bi-polar have taught me to be strong and rely on myself. It also taught me, after years of therapy and self analysis, that people’s words can’t have power over you unless you allow them to.
I’ve always been very empathetic to others. My parents said as a toddler I would cry if a character got hurt or died in a Disney movie. I used to think this […]
Hey,
Just had the typical rush of negative thoughts and events of my life come at me. It really makes me quit…and just want to go somewhere peaceful and alone…not my home.
What I wish in life is just me being in this peaceful place in nature by myself…just to think and watch. That would make my life perfect.
Unfortunately, I am in a confined state of mind. All I do is study for classes for undergraduate (pre-med), which I like, but cannot stand the stress.
What do you wish?
It is automn and I am five. I m a lonely child, my friend are more ghost I created than real ones. I m thinking about death. Dad is dead. I I m wondering were his soul is and if his body is eaten by worms. But I now I m not supposed to ask myself this questions so as Mom asked I just smile and say “hello” to the all lady speaking to a grave.
AI m 8 and Mom says I will have a new father. He gave me a beautiful doll and de hide together in the moutains. I love him as I […]
My friends tell me they care, but I know they really don’t. People see my wrists and think “ew what is wrong with that girl.” It doesn’t surprise me. I dress weird, I color my hair.. I look terrible. Why can’t we all be accepted? We live in such a judgmental world. That’s why I’m deciding to end it in a few months, just take as many sleeping pills as I can; and just cut my veins open. Cut my legs one last time. And leave a note. Explaining why I hate my life. Nobody cares until something bad happens. So mine as well end […]
I’m tired of life, i am so tired that today i forgot to hide my wrist. I am so caught up and lost in this depression that i don’t even know what to do with myself anymore. My mother saw my cuts, she yelled and i yelled. I am now placed in therapy and under suicide watch. I am trapped , i can no longer be alone and that just makes me want to die more. My next cut is going to be deeper and the other deeper and deeper. Am i hurting others? Or am i just hurting myself ? i thought i was […]
I absolutely hate it when people say things like “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem” or “it gets better” or “everyone has hard times, you just have to get past it”. I totally understand that most people who say these things have great intentions, and are just trying to make me feel better or inspire me to keep living and I 100% am grateful for that, for them trying to help, for them trying to understand but that doesn’t make those sayings sound any less stupid to me. And that’s not to say that I don’t love the people saying those things […]
I don’t know where to start. I’m a girl, I’m 20 and I think I’ve completely ruined my life.
I have cheated on my boyfriend of three years several times when drunk. I had sex with one, and the others were kisses only.
what can I do? Well, I’ve told him. He forgave me. But I did it once more than he knows about. I don’t know what to do, I don’t think there’s any way out. I love him so much, I truly do. I don’t know why I do it when I’m drunk.
You can say it, I’m a complete *****. I know.
But guys, I think […]
Into the deep blue depression sea (I wrote this a couple years ago)
These scars on my wrists
are from when I was pissed
uncontrollable anger
silent screams of unspoken words
I see stories
you see scars
lines of defeat
wounds of strength
Self mutilation feels better than you think
especially when your blood rises and your skin turns pink
constant competition between mind and body
both so weak you all you can do is fall
You say you “understand”
but nobody ever will
not even me.
-Harley