Do any of you have something or an experience you want? A dream you had once? Small ones or big ones?
I want to see my best friend live a happy life. Maybe have some of my poetry published. Move to NZ and have a child.
If I could.
If you were healthy, what would you do?
No horny white boy, i do not want to see your penis
no horny white boy i do not want to exchange pictures
Yes horny white boy i do not want anything between us
No that does not mean come closer, be warned i have scissors
No horny white boy that does not mean i am a racist
No horny white boy this is not because your white
Horny white boy i wouldn’t take penis pictures regardless
No horny white boy just because your white does not make you right
I feel like I’m slowing down. Everything sounds distant or submerged in water. My vision blurs in and out of focus. I have no energy to do anything, not that I want to anyway.
Is this what dying feels like?
I have yet to find someone who tolerates me talking in metaphors, or even enjoys me doing it.
Regardless of all this, I’m still here, so maybe that counts for something.
I spent a large portion of this afternoon running my fingers over the scar on my throat, or staring at it in the mirror. A wound that by every right should have killed me. No one can live […]
Does it seem unfair that most of us are born into emotional debt? Our parents love us from before Day One, and thereafter we can’t unlive, or live unwell, without hurting them – not to mention those whose love we accrue over the following years. Being loved is a blessing, or so I hear, but it’s also bondage.
Sometimes I want to kill myself out of protest, but: 1) even depressed and anhedonic, I know that hurting those who love me is wrong; 2) it’s possible that I chose to be here and accept this debt; and 3) the One I’d be protesting against would likely […]
Whatever it or they may be.
Model ships, history, reading, drawing, photography, design, walking, jogging. There is a lot out there on offer. We cant be wallowing in self pity. We need to try and find ways to keep on, keep trying, keep investigating.
You never know whats around the corner. Could be the start of an exciting and prosperous life, or it could be more struggles and bullshit, but we wont know if were not here to see it.
I love music. Im always talking about it, listening to it, embracing it. Theres something out there for us all. That one thing that makes life worth trying […]
The more I think about it the more I say Fuck this world! Sure there is much beauty on this planet but then it is vivaciously obscured by the undignified injustices that occur daily as they have been for centuries. The greed, governmental corruption, theft, intentional misleading by our elected officials just so that they can fulfill their own agendas and Fuck the next guy; have greatly distorted my perceptions of the beautiful life that is painted for us as children!!! I guess that’s called “reality.” The beauty of this planet is one thing (another existence that we as humans are slowly destroying as well) […]
This is my last time writing this to someone because I’m ending myself. Nothing seems worth living for except a few things, which are not yet here with me. What are those things? Having my first child. Having my first relationship. Drinking coconut juice, very refreshing. Anyways, here is my pouring out thoughts of you: I still think about you every day. I’m quite sure it’s not the same for you. But I wouldn’t know. Though you could say I’m still in love with you, I don’t consider I am, in fact, I feel I’m near over you. ‘We loved with a love that was […]
I’m just to tired to go on. I’ve been fighting depression for about 5 years now, and seen tons of shrinks and been on every kind of anti-depressant
there is…and nothing has worked. Hell has be to better than this. It’s hard being alone with these dark thoughts, but even harder to be around
people and have to fake it. I actually get angry now when I hear people say that there is help out there, bullshit! If I could even see a tiny tiny glimmer of light at the end of this tunnel, I might have some hope, but nothing but blackness for five long years […]
It makes me upset when I, or others post about things that are bothering us and are kicked around by some hateful comments. I hate that. For example, “Try living my life for one damn day I don’t cry about it on some shitty website 24/7 for attention. Get over your lesbian self harming self.”. We just need to vent. If people really are on here because they consider being miserable some sort of giant competition, what do you possibly gain out of it? I’m just on here to vent when I feel really shitty. I should find a different forum. This is so childish.
Think about it –
DENIAL – death can’t be final right? god is in control right?. We need someone that will save us. We think – this can’t be all there is! our suffering must have a purpose right? Were gonna be in a better place after we die right? my grandpa is in heaven and his body is not his anymore but just a shell right?
ANGER – God why are you not listening to me? I been praying and trying to be a good person! fuck you!
BARGAINING – To me this what prayer is! I promise god ill be a good person if you help […]
I talked to him about the lack of communication between us; and it took a bit of getting through his stubbornness and thick head, buut, he understood eventually. We’re alright, which is good, he keeps me going. I may not try again after all.
this is the truth for all
God of this Universe is the one that is Accountable for the ENTIRE HUMAN RACE ON THIS GOD”S EARTH
we are NOT GUILTY OF NOTHING… MANKIND RACE IS SO NOT GUILTY … GODS ENERGY IS THE ONE THAT DID IT TO ALL OF US HERE. so if you commit sucide do not worry about nothing. One day I will be their also and I know for a fact that this Energy God knows who did what!!! ENERGY GOD DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if NOT for this Energy God NONE of us would Never have such a Evil Negative Life on this earth […]
SHE. That’s how I refer to her when I talk to you. Because it hurts to see you happy with someone else. I see pictures of the two of you and it Kills me. I want nothing more than to be yours again.. and then I remember how you treated me. Every time you made me feel worthless and unwanted. Every time you spat my name as though it were some foul substance that your body was rejecting. I was never a part of ‘us’ because you were with me out of pity. So Why do I still speak to you? I think part of […]
The post mentioning GGB reminds me of my story.
I spent some time around GGB with the most perfect woman in the world. I’m on another side of the globe. I flied to her place, and she brought me to GGB as one of the tourist spots.
I don’t think we will meet again. I don’t think she would want to see me anymore. But the photo of two of us in front of GGB keeps popping up in my phone.
And I’m here on this site. I just feel, maybe everything is related.
We’re all little dust particles, none of us really matter in the end, but we can enjoy floating in the sunlight
Until the sky clamps shut and we fall to the floor in dark water
Shit, I didn’t take my pill today, what the fuck am I thinking
I used to ask the god I believe in to put all of my families burdens on myself instead of them. For them to be able to live peaceful happy lives at the cost of my own life. I would never take that back, and I still would say the same today. I can’t complain that my own life is not easy. Maybe it’s really just all of this coming to fruition. My family is happier and more peaceful than I have ever seen them and in this time of happiness I am completely seperate from them all. Miles and miles seperate us locking me […]
Dear ole friend:
We were bullied together. This bonded us.
We fought with each other. This strengthened us.
We teased each other. This helped us.
Your mom killed herself. This broke us.
You won’t talk to me. This hurts me.
I wish I was your mom. Then you wouldn’t die.
But I know. You’re just like your mom. I just hope I can wait until after you die so you don’t lose two people in the same year.
I used to hate you for trying to be my friend. But you finally made it.
I’m gonna miss you. Bye…
~Me
ok so about 9 months ago i started dating this guy named mike and we would last 3-4 months break up and get back together about 3 months ago we broke up and hardly talked for thoes three months but then about 2 weeks ago i started talking more to his sister cause shes pretty cool and then i startd talking to him again because this whole time we have been broken up hes all i can think about… well we made plans that after i worked saturday i would get picked up and go to mikes sisters house, kim, but then friday mike was […]
So we (people on this site) should go find a deserted island to claim as our own. We will need a flag, of course, as per Eddie Izzard, and a thousand other things, but then the rest of humanity doesn’t have to deal with us, and vice-versa. I vote for the name Nutsia, so the inhabitants can be known as Nuts. >:) What do you think? (And today on “Why do emoticons hate me?”…)
Everything we think is real may not be, it’s a strange concept but what if the things others say to us are said differently to what they say to others at the same time but we interpret those words in a pre destined way?
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