I think I fucked up everything. I was a fuck up socially in school. Barely had anyone to talk to. That wasn’t very fun. I used to never leave the house. I was just a sad piece of shit. That all kinda changed this year. Met some people, started going to concerts. Actually had a job for over a year. My life was getting so good. Then I met this girl. She was amazing. Everything about her was perfect. Even her imperfections I ended up loving. The way she let her messy hair go. The way she never wore makeup because she didn’t give a […]
I’m coming to my last days of high school and the past week has been hell. It’s had such an effect on me knowing that I won’t ever be there again. It’s so weird, and kinda unsettling.
I’ve also realised how lonely I am. Everyone has their groups and their best friends but I just float around. Gets on with most people but just keeps under the radar.
That also brings up another point. Everyone on here seems to know someone and they know all their stuff and its so nice that people support each other here. I think I’m asking if someone would like to be my […]
It’s like fucking 5 o’ clock in the morning, a time in which normal people can sleep right? Well screw that! What a better time than this? This just happened to me.
I was talking to my best friend (and unluckily for me I’m in love with her). That’s why I’m awake.
So yeah, things were going normal until she said “I love you” and lots of hearts. For some reason I knew she wasn’t the one who was sending those messages. But then again you couldn’t imagine how happy I was.
Guess what? I was right. I then received a voice message that said it wasn’t […]
I am a bloated festering abomination to mankind. I am a whipping boy for the pleasure of others. I’ve heard it said that one who is serious about suicide will never telegraph their intentions. Tis true, I suppose, after my mind’s lengthy discourse on the subject, my own secrecy remains intact. Yet here I am. A cry for HELP??? God forbid. I’ve had “help” before. Lesser sires to bastard children attend me in my need. Incompetent, insincere parasites. To improve society, the cessation of my existence is of tantamount importance. The world should advance is most certainly better off without me. The dregs of personality […]
http://youtu.be/fNx2Fmdp-4Y
Hi,
I’ve decided I’m going to end my life in just under 14 days. That’s fairly soon, but it’s my time to go… and we all know that when it’s time – it’s time. But first, a little about me:
I’m 26 years old, worked a job like no other and had been married for three years. I left my old job and ended up working in construction and telecommunications for a time, before meeting the supposed “love of my life”. Not many people escape my old job, but I managed to. I didn’t let it change me and a voice in my head reminds me that […]
this is gunna take a lot off courage so yeah, im fed up with people bullying me now and they say i ask for it, well i dont, ever since secondry i was bullied so much, i was bullied to the point were i wanted to end my life, i came home day after day crying, i never coped well in school and even at college i got bullied, i was so insecure about my self i used to wear make up/foundation because i wansnt happy with my skin i hated having spots wearing foundation gave me a confidence boost untill i got bullied for […]
A comment exchange led to a sudden consideration of what would happen if you ended up meeting someone from on SP in person and becoming friends/partners/whatever. (That’s happened, I believe?) I mean, what would you say if someone asked where you met each other? “I. Uh. Online. We’ll go with online.”
And, yeah, there will be the wise-asses among you who will happily tell people where you met. I’m well aware. 😛
Oh, and I’m passing for a boy now, as long as I don’t open my mouth. Fuck yeah. My brother’s friends call me Matt. Fuck yeah.
I finished my research paper.
I talked to a counselor about a LGBT support group.
I took my pill today.
My grandma hasn’t called up yet to drag my ass back to her house to rot in a pious censored environment.
For the first time in 14 years on this cracked polluted smelly grey earth, I’m myself.
If you think about it, everything on this earth is essentially shit, or at least some form of shit.
FUCK YEAH. SHOUT IT. 4 more years and I’m free […]
So I’m broke. More than half of my worldly posetions were stolen from me. I lost my grants and have doubled the amount of debt I’m in. I don’t have the tools neccesary to do anything other than go to work, go to school, be an alcoholic. Being an alcoholic isn’t even fun anymore because I can’t even do the shit alcy’s do ykno. Like make an ass of themselves in public. It’s been this shitty for a while now, with no end in sight.
So have a drink on me.
It’s free.
I don’t wanna do this anymore I can’t handle it anymore everyone trying to change me into a person I don’t wanna be and it upsets me to be hating myself everyday. Everyone thinks yeah she’s happy she’s smiling but they never ask me if I’m alright or see if I’m upset, why are people judged on the outter look I hate it people thinking they know me and thinking it don’t upset when it does. I hate that people judge me through. I just feel like everyone is against me even though I know their not, I can’t do this anymore I just don’t […]
Yeah it doesnt really help to have people posting saying only I can solve my problems. NO offense, but I know that. Im trying to express pain. Do you have ptsd from being sexually abused, do you know the myriad number of symptoms? mine was so bad i ended up on the street. my flesh is battered and worn from years of trauma. i want off disability, out of this cold and triggering hellhole where i live right now in new england, no bus on the weekends, last two cars i had more or less blew up, old and worthless after a few short months, […]
So, mood drop. Woo….
My nephew punched my little brother -like they always play around, and my brother punched back – again, as they always play.
But this time my nephew was being whiny because his mom is here. And she’s starting shit, woo!
I’m so close, to fucking stabbing her. I’m sick of this shit, so fucking sick… She calls us bad people?
She was outside yelling at my brother about how we ALWAYS abuse her children, and her daughter was sitting at the table with my dad and I LAUGHING HER ASS OFF
“I think she’s got it backwards,” her daughter told us. “She’s the one who beats […]
I’m not technically suicidal. I just wish I were dead. The relief. Or someone else who is normal. I am bipolar and I cannot be genuine in relationships. I cannot date. I keep myself to myself on my personal time. My best friends are all those I had as a young child. I was always funny (what fucked up person isn’t the funniest?) At work I am the funny hard worker. You’ll never see me bring depression or sadness into the workplace. No one would have a clue I’m drowning in my own ego. My friends don’t know anything. One actually complimented me just last […]
Yeah, yeah, I know – more generic “hopeful” bullshit. But, hey … one way or another, we are all still here, despite everything. I kinda think we deserve some credit for that 😉
L4Y
I don’t have anyone in this world. No friends or girlfriend, nothing at all. I’m only 18 but I don’t want to get a job and work for the rest of my life. It just seems like torture. I’m also afraid of getting old. I don’t want to be remembered like that. I’d rather die while I’m still young. Not only that but I generally dislike humans. We do a lot of horrible things and yeah this world is just cruel. I also feel controlled as a human, it’s hard to explain but yeah.. I want to feel like I’m the one in control and […]
And to think that I actually believed you.
You said you wanted me, just me. Now you’re changing, and you no longer want me anymore. Yeah. Leave me. From the beginning, I’ve never left you at all. If I do so it must be because you’re busy. Or I need time alone. You left me. You said I will leave, but now you’re the one leaving. Yeah go on. I like how you lie. Yeah. Go on. Pain is addictive. Hurt me more if you can. In this relationship I’ve never pretended before. I sincerely love you with all my heart. Hah. Who knows, […]
So as you can see you already know what i’m about to talk about, yeah i might be young but sex as a different meaning for me the more the half of the other my age younger or older, yes i’m a virgin but it’s really sad seeing sex just becoming what its becoming today as weird as it may seems sex is a gift, i see i as a gift, a gift to your husband and wife and it’s kinda the reason why i want to stay a virgin till marriage (lol if i’m not dead ) but yeah i always tough of sex […]
i was so cough with the thing that i was writing the i forgot, i forgot to introduce myself.
So hey, my name i’ll keep it anonymous but you can always call me Y, i’m 14, i’m a girl and yes i’m dealing with depression, from quite a while actually (since 2010) well not really a while.
Hmm yeah that’s all
hmm if you want to you can always check my secret account on instagram @cant.fixme (pretty much the same username)
And that’s all…. well for now
still sitting here hating everyone and everything…if its just a chemical imbalance then why is it not fixed? yeah things suck but they will not get any better either.
I quit my job and moved across the country so that I could afford living without a job while I apply to grad programs. At the same time as studying for the GRE, I got engaged to be married. You’d think it would be a really exciting time in my life, but the same two months I was going to use for improving my GRE score ended up being dedicated to wedding planning. Wedding planning was a nightmare, I felt extremely depressed, and then I would beat myself up for feeling depressed during a time I was supposed to be happy. Oh yeah, I forgot […]