If I were to do this – I would go about it this way.
Trains – Trains wiegh thousands of pounds. It would not have to hurt either. You may not even have to feel fear,  if you just go lay on the track and fall asleep close to the time the next train will come. The driver would not be at fault either – it would take him at least a mile before he could stop the train and that might be too late.
I am thinking of using a train.
Why?
These reasons may seem silly but I hate this constant pain. Like most suicide people the amount of pain and trauma are more than I can deal with. My dog is 15 years old and suffers from a collapsing trachea. It is a condition that can get progressivley worse and could kill him. He would cough himself to death. When I was in 9th grade I had to watch my dog die from pneumonia. I do not want to watch my friend die like that again. I would rather die then have to go through that all over. He is just a little 4 pound dog! He is too cute to go out like that! I take him to the vet and I ask for help. She gave me an honest answer “He is 15 years old, anything can kill him”. He sometimes takes a steroid but that is only a temporary fix. Last night was really bad – But he still holds on! I can’t do this anymore. Everyday it feels like someone is putting a papercut on my heart. I do feel greatful that he is still here, yet I hate that I feel stuck and I cannot move on. I cn’t put him down yet because it is not bad enough to put him down – I have to sit and slowly wiat till we get to that point.
I am not happy with my marrige. I am not an equal partner but somewhere above the pets. My wife is a fun person but she does not value me as an equal or care what I have to say about something. I tried to break up with her six times when we were dating but it was like my opinion did not matter. I can’t get out. I just got a new job, and I feel I am not adequate for it. I know that if we wait maybe a rainbow will appear at then end of the stom – but I am SO tempted to give into the storm.
Please help.
2 comments
A train would work, make sure you position yourself properly though.
However, the fact that you got a new job is great(do you know how many people out there are struggling to get work?.) You should keep at that, and start working on your self esteem, you only think you’re inadequate. Start doing things that will help you understand you work more. Study at home, to become the best you can. Honestly, some background prep on work is usually very aiding.
I know it’s hard to let go of a your friend, but death comes a’hunting, animals have a shorter life span than us undeserving humans.
Please take care.
i think what you are craving is respect, not a train. I am so sorry that your wife does not show you unconditional respect that men absolutely need. If you want to talk to me, or if you feel more comfortable talking to a man, by boyfriend or I would love to talk to you. Your wife may not make you feel precious, but I tell you that you are. God loves you and you can never escape that. Please email if you want to talk or talk to my boyfriend we would love to get to know you and help in anyway we can 🙂
Love,
Adrianne
altera.ad@gmail.com