I just finished reviewing Final Exit site and contemplating on contacting them for my right to die.
Hmmm wonders if they just might think I am crazy.
I live in a constant state of exhaustion from a completely disabling form of sleep deprivation, which I was born with and was diagnosed at the age of 35 in 1994. The medical staff who were involved in the testing and diagnoses were surprised to how severe the sleep deprivation was and was informed by doctor that they really couldn’t comprehend how I was still alive and made it as long as I had at that time and ranked me in the 99% severity in United States. Prior to those specific tests I had been encouraged to stop trying to work by a mental health case worker for just the severe clinical depression I was being treated for and apply for Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI), which she had to fill the paperwork out for me due to my inability to do so myself. I was denied on my 1st application on the depression itself. I was approved on my 1st appeal with this additional diagnoses with SSDI and still remain on to this day.
Basicly I live in a perpetual state of exhaustion every moment of my life and there was no real treatment for this neurological sleep disorder other than sleeping pills which don’t really help improve my condition. Basicly I was informed by my doctor straight from his mouth “The good news is You are fucked and the bad news is I will have to be medicated the remainder of my life”
Somewhere around the age of 9-10 suicidal and homicidal thinking patterns had emerged, which I had never shared with anyone So this is just 1994 and I have gone through even much more worse crap from real suicide attemts and being pissed they failed and other major stuff.
Damit I was writing this over night & my pc power supply fried, just setup this really old pc up throughout the day for now & it’s really slow. The internet is critical to me being I am laid out most of the time.
6 comments
I have been feeling the same about my physical illness too. I feel your pain.
I know sleep deprivation sux.How many hours of sleep do you get a night?I’ve been 2 weeks with nothing at all and has been going on for years and years.It’s gonna be the end of me.There is nothing the doctors can do
That’s what i’m thinking.I’ve been sent to these bloody psychiatrists for 6 years getting nowhere,when it could be a neurological disorder.I will get them to refer me
when I am able to fall asleep my body prevents me from getting much of the restoritive sleep to allow me to ever get reknewed, which was recorded in a reputable sleep clinic in a major Psyc Hospital in my city & 6 years after I was diagnosed Bethesda Naval Hospital wired me up also. I know there’s nothing docs can do. I returned to see my sleep doc last year & he was once the head of the sleep docs association of USA. top credential guy in the business. I am fooked. so I know without a shred of doubt I have done everything possible.
I have chosen my right to die when I get things in order before the worst of the hottest time of summer strikes here
I have many similar symptoms as you. Searched high and low..visited every doctor and tried every modality that I know of.
I’m traveling to Brazil in mid May for a miracle. There is a master healer the town has named John of God. You can check him out on youtube, he was discussed on Oprah. If there is part of you that wishes to live, that is what I would suggest. Be well.