Choking out

Omg the feeling
The feeling of choking out after a month of being off tue habit, finally tonight i will choke out until i sleep, its 2:45am aight. Except im not used to choking anymore, the side effects are 10x stronger, i feel paranoia because of that night i thought the illuminati was watching me. I feel dizzy and light headed and cold and prickly from choking. Omg but the feeling of needing to put my hands on my neck was unbearable, my progress from my depression era left and i fear it may come back to at least visit very soon. Must do it again… Omg my arm feels uncomfortable and bones ache, idk why, i wanna keep doing it, but the consequences are bad, all my progress…