God’s Creation and Mine Insanity

This is my first post. I dont know why i deicide to start now. I feel terriblly sad. Im getting dizzy even though im laying down. I dont even know if this is worth typing but im going to continue anyways. It was raining before but now it stop. Im on summer vaction and nothing more i can do. I have to read to old people insted of being lock up in my room. My surrounds are no more than God’s creation. How he did this surpise me even more. Im falling victim of insanity and i dont even know it. The deeper i think about it the more i feel like something is wrong. Im going crazier and crazier in my mind. Everything i think of is closing in on me. I dont know what to think anymore. I just want to tear my skin out from the flesh and bone. I want to know how this has become. All of his creations.Was it all supposed to be kept as a sercet. Waiting for someone to crack under the pressure of God’s creation. I dont even know who i am anymore. I dont even know what to think. Till i find out the truth. Its either sanity or death.