I’ve started cutting again. I’m really lonely. I just sit in the basement(that’s where my room is) and paint black and blood red hearts. I hate seeing how happy other couples are together. It makes me sad. It reminds me of how I have no one to go to, no one who won’t get mad at me for being depressed. I wish I had a special someone. I don’t like crying Alone on my bed anymore. At least I can sleep. But I wish I wouldn’t wake up. Life is painful. And it hurts to breathe.
20 comments
I know exactly how you feel.
I am so sorry you feel this way. It is hard when people get mad at you for being depressed. Realize it is their fear that is making them react that way; they are afraid you might commit suicide, and that they will be left behind feeling guilty.
And please go to a doctor. Antidepressants work most of the time.
Hugs to you, sweetheart. <3
I’m already taking antidepressants and it’s not working
Then you need to tell your doc and get different ones.
Also, you could be bipolar. It would be good to go to an actual psychiatrist. If the first one isn’t good, keep looking.
I care. Know that.
I asked my dad, and he’s not gonna take me to any doctor or psychiatrist
Wow. Talk to the one you have already, and change the meds.
Have you asked him? Don’t assume if you haven’t. If you have asked, and he said no, then tell him a doctor is cheaper than a funeral. It might hit home then.
If I told him that he would be even more pissed off at me, and punish me and stuff. And I dont have a doctor
hey i 2 know how you feel…i have mainly the same problem…with me its like having a few friends (no girlfriend 🙁 ) but whenever i’m depressed i have one i can talk to about it but she wont see me face to face…and the friends i can see face to face, cant handle it…and my parents are trying to hard to get me to tell them stuff but thy don’t see that thy are part of the problems…and btw thy just don’t understand…and yes i have a specialist but after a month ore 3 its still the same…for me its not working so well… and what you ware telling about the couples … its the same here… especially when going out and in summer…
be strong and stay alive
I’m weak, and I’ll be dead soon. I don’t belong in this world.
@Sander Jansen, “be strong and stay alive”? In my mind true strength comes from those who embrace death not hide from it
im not hiding from it…im trying to fight it…i know this world is not my world…and im hoping to die and finely be understood and have a place ware i can be myself and be respected…and a litle i hope to become a ghost in this world with the option to switch between “heaven” and this world…so that i can mess with the people that messed with me…i really want to hurt them…freak them out and pay back for what thy did to me…for over 10 years now (im now 21 and thinking of killing myself from about 11)
You must get a doctor and some meds. Check yourself into a free clinic, or institution, if you must. Don’t continue feeling this way, or kill yourself, without trying every avenue. These free places will get you the meds you need.
Embracing death, when it is natural, is strength. Embracing suicide is not.
Thanks for trying to help, but if things keep getting worse, well I’m better off dead anyway.
No, you are not. You have something to offer the world and yourself. You will not always feel this way.
What if I do always feel this way??
Why don’t you try everything first? And then give it a couple of years, anyway. You are too young to give up so easily. I hate that we are losing young people to suicide at an alarming rate. Be miserable for at least ten years before doing something drastic like committing suicide. Please?
How about 6 months or a year? No way Im waiting for ten years. If nothing gets better in the next year, then I will commit suicide. I promise.
Maybe I’m young, but I’ve been through too much to live through anymore pain.
Ok, wait a year…if that is the best I can get, I will take it.