Crumbs

It feels like everything has reduced to crumbs, literally everything. The color has just drained itself out of the world and I can’t come back to the surface. I thought about ending it all last night. I wanted to so bad. My boyfriend doesn’t understand. I need him and he doesn’t care. My uncle has recently been diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia. Today he is leaving us. There is nothing more they can do for him. The tube he breaths through they are going to take out this morning because he doesn’t want to suffer anymore. I would give anything to be in his place. He is only 48. He needs to live. I don’t. He deserves to live. I don’t.