Welcome back, sucker… (my clinical death)

  September 17th, 2011 by whatthehell

Since i am back to this shithole again, at least i will share my experience. I recently attempted to suicide (don’t ask me what i did- didn’t work anyway), but unfortunately my best friend (not so best anymore) found me soon enough and took me to a hospital. Some random doctor brought me back to life (or hell to be more accurate) and now i sit at a computer, digesting the success of my failure. Those bloody doctors are so damn good these days…..

Regarding what actually happened while i was „on my way“- nothing. Don’t remember anything specific, no tunnel, light, dead relatives/friends, looking at doctors from the ceiling, or using the „heaven escalator“… nothing (didn’t even get to meet Michael Jackson). I guess these things would come post 5mins? In case you wonder- yes i was diagnosed dead (for c.1,5mins). Maybe my memory is poor, but most probably my brain just wanted to prevent me from experiencing the extreme frustration that would come after realizing what hell of a wonderland was waiting for me on the other side.

PS I don’t think i will do it again. If those folks managed to wake me up a bit later, i could’ve been crippled forever. After all, as soon as we are born, we start dying. I guess I’ll just wait until I „naturally“ reach the Davy Jones’ Locker and keep faking my smile while getting straight A’s in my inability to live any aspect of my life as a normal person.

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