Just wanted to say.
I am alive but numb, not sure I know how to be human anymore.
Was promised a man, he came, he faked and he dumped me in the worst possible situation you could ever dump a woman.
It’s not that I want to die, it’s just I don’t want to live.
I want to go back to where I came from which isn’t planet earth.
Without a man there is very little I can do.
Don’t ask for much but all I get is requests for more of what I simply do not have.
The bottles empty lie with it.
I have nothing more to give, if someone has something to offer good if not I have nothing more to give, not even to myself.
Need t get this girl somewhere safe, safe seems to mean dead these days.
Got myself in the situation where I can never be self sufficient again, not through my own fault and nobody cares.
No help, no nothing.
Who would want to live in a world like this.
36 years thrown away for no reason whatsoever.
Had I lived a selfish life I can understand but of all people me.
I miss myself, my creativity, my smile, my plans, my games.
Takes some vile type of person to want to destroy that side of a person.
Force a creative person into total uncreativity surrounded by people that would do anything to see you live like a vegetable and there you have it.
The perfect reason to kill yourself.
5 comments
What do you mean “promised a man”.Was this some online hook up and he was a con man or something? Why do you think you can’t do anything without a man
There are some decent ones out there if you look and will treat you well
Did you by any chance just come out of a relationship with a Narcissist (Narcissistic Personality Order) ? I have, and your words describe exactly what they do to you. They suck you empty and dry, of all that makes you you, and then discard your empty shell like used toilet paper. They are the original prototype for the vampire myth.
I have survived this (just) and am just starting to understand what happened, and am beginning to heal. And no, I will not kill myself because that wii let evil win.
If this rings a bell with you let me know, and maybe we can help each other.
http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/articles/narcissism-understood.htm
This article made all the difference to me, now I understand…
Do you still love the guy.
i’ve lost myself as well. I definitely am numb. I miss who i used to be, so carefree, loving, and bubbly. Not quite sure when i started losing myself, all i know is i have now completely lost myself. The statement you said “It’s not that I want to die, it’s just I don’t want to live” truly speaks to me, its like you took those words right out of my heart, mind, and soul. I feel like a zombie. So numb. so frozen. so unsure. so lost.