I feel fairly uncomfortable being at this site at all. I feel uncomfortable by the thought of suicide. So why am I here at all? I guess I’m just reaching out. I guess I’m mostly scared. For right now.
I’m pretty sure that I have bipolar-disorder. I know, in this day and age, everyone self-diagnoses with some mental disorder or another. The difference for me is that I’ve done the research, I’ve considered a lot of other problems, but I’m pretty sure it’s bipolarity. It runs in the family, being crazy.
Some days, I’m really happy and I feel like life is so precious. Then other days I feel like it’s all pointless. No matter what we do, you can’t change the fact that everyone dies. Alone.
4 comments
Hey ‘Lovelybones’
Nice name may i say 🙂
Guess what? Its okay to be scared in life, thats perfectly okay. Plus i think it took considerable bravery to post and say things as honestly as you have so congrats for being brave enough.
First things first, don’t self diagnose. I say this because “often” people, especially young people (and even adults) can go thru some pretty tough “situational life things” eg close pple passing, relationship breakups, being/feeling alone, etc etc and these can ALL contribute to whether we feel able or not to cope with our personal situation.
Other times, our mood swings are not caused by situations necessarily (BUT MOSTLY THEY ARE) and can arise due to chemical imbalances. Off course this happens but it is quite rare. Chemicals in our body are a funny thing.
If we get shouted out or abused (ie situational things), this can alter our chemicals in our body.
Likewise, when we get a hug, kiss, feel loved, this too can alter our chemicals (for the better) in our body.
So be careful in diagnosing yourself and assuming the worst for yourself.
Often just HOW WE THINK affects our chemicals….and staying positive IS THE FIRST STEP to a healthier life & lifestyle.
Don’t also assume it runs in the family. QUITE OFTEN, people’s coping mechanisms with stress / pressure / challenges are what usually run in the family, unless they can get an “outside perspective” of how to better deal with things.
The first true step is to understand WHEN & WHY we get down/anxious etc.
Can i suggest you write down in a journal under the heading “bad moods” (and write what ur mood is) and then make a brief point maybe what led up to this mood/feeling.
You might be surprised the problem isnt always you and rather the situation or perhaps just how you think about stuff (ie positive or negative).
Its important to stay positive when we are faced with challenges, its how we get stronger.
Life can get better, promise. If you want to discuss stuff, feel free okay.
Stay good.
Ad Astra Per Aspera (To The Stars Thru Difficulty)
ps also “IF” you do have some chemical imbalance, it would exist along a spectrum of low to higher. But i would never call someone with a chemical imbalance crazy
ie people who diabetes may habe an insulin imbalance and can they feel tired or low or moody ….doesnt mean crazy.
So again, look at all things from dietary to lifestyle factors to situations ..all can affet moods/chemicals etc
consider all this and then maybe chat to a vg GP, possibly a female (assuming you are female etc).
Hope this helps.
Is that what bothers you the most? The thought of dying alone?
I am bipolar too.I used to take Lithium to keep my moods under control.Now I take Valporate Sodium.