i always write here when i feeling some type of way, and right now i do.
I hate the fact that i think about suicide 24/7. when i do something bad, when someone yells at me, when my parent argue, when i get bad grades, when i look at myself in the mirror, when im standing next to my best friend, when people are starring at me, anything. I really feel like im going to commit suicide on march 31st.  I have a gut feeling i am, im just so really ready to die. im so ready for all of this to just stop, im not even sure if i can make  it to march 31st honestly. Nobody likes me. Yesterday my sister sent me a text message saying “know what bek, I dont know what in the hell i did to you, but i want you to know that i love you and proud of everything that you accomplished and will accomplish and i know that you will go far in life.”
this makes me want to die even more….because all this stuff, i know i wont accomplish much in life, because im not living in this life anymore, im just done. with everything. it’s so much more reasons behind this. but this is all i feel like saying.
5 comments
I’d rather be dead too … but im not allowed to die in this suffering state of being. So right now, I have no other choice but to ATTEMPT to try to get better,, but.. that’s going to take… alot(!!!!). Iono, maybe you can help me out? iono…
of course i can! but i have to tell you i suck at this kind of stuff, but we can at lease try and help each other out. =/
I guess we can.. see what we can cook up?… I’m sure im even more crappy than you are, everytime i reach out to people, 100% of the time I just suddenly dissapear!!!! so yeah.. =|
email me
bnb039 @ yahoo . com
I feel the way you do, but try and take what happens in your life and change into something positive. For example, the text you got from your sister; use that as a will to go on. Someone out there believes in you, and trust me, she’s not the only one. Stay strong <3 I know its hard because you feel like people don't mean it or you don't deserve it, but try and do it for you.