Probably getting our hours cut at work down to part time in the next few months. And my other job is laying me off.
Which means even less money on top of the salary cut last year.
And they are adding considerably more work and duties.
Not complaining but this place is just jacking us left and right.
Even though we exceeded paramaters for a year without a manager and six months without a direct supervisor.
Was trying to hang on until January of next year for my birthday but seems like it will be sometime this summer.
Guess I can take someone’s advice on here and get a credit card at the last minute and max it out. No wife or children to have to bear expenses and I have got to go and set up my living will and cremation money.
Planned onthe family never knowing but since I may have to rush it the traveling and then demise are not possible.
Heh, funny how life smashes your plans. I’ll see if I can eke together enough to swing by Taiwan, South Korea, and Japan before I go. Probably not but at least I want to see Japan.
I’ll probably post a lot more in the coming weeks.  Just some last thoughts to get off my chest when the verification of the job issues come.
As always… I wish healing and a joyous life to those who still have hope, and a quick and painless end to those who are sure.
And to the youth…. try to live. There is a lot out there that you have not seen yet.
15 comments
Enjoy your journey…
I really hate to hear about all the problems your having. I enjoy reading your posts. You seem to be a very caring and compassionate person. I hope things change for the better for you but if not I hope you have a painless peaceful ending. Sincerely Tami.
Hi.
Taiwan’s a very beautiful city, filled with lots of energy and awesome food. I do hope you visit some time–the scenery is fantastic as well.
Also, I hope that your job works out. Is there no chance you could maybe switch an employer before the cuts rain down harder? Or perhaps an alternate, more stable career?
Take care, please.
ty
I can now understand where you are coming from a lot better, UN. We recently engaged in a bit of sparring about the selfishness of suicide. Hearing your story, I respect your choice and wish you peace, at the same time agreeing with Murphy – you do sound caring and compassionate, and wishing there was another solution.
My heart goes out to you!
Im young, and i think i have seen enough. Please don’t leave me, i need you…
Uh, I mixed up posts, this was meant to go to the previous one.
@Tami
Thank you. And I’m not done yet so I’ll be here for a little while longer rooting for all of you.
@ty83
Appreciate the description of Taiwan and the suggestions. Doubt I could find something else in time and despite earlier cuts I still lived a decent lifestyle. So I’d probably make less somewhere else. And changing fields would require school loans which would be even more taxing.
@abuse survivor
I understand. And I have a considerable respect for you and your perspective. You made some very good points.
@Nat
If you say you have then who am I to debate with you.
Still there is something to be said with being able to live on one’s own around people who are on average more mature than some youth.
I’m not gone yet.
If you want to vent you can email me @gouki99x@gmail.com
I’ll probably be checking it daily and if I do not get back to you post haste, I will as soon as I can.
Please believe in yourself Nat. Do not get to the point where your connection with life is just gone. Do not become me. Become better. One of the things I told my son and one of the things I tell my nieces and nephews. We older folks want you younger ones to exceed us as respectable humans. And to care for and support each other so sites like this will eventually not have to exist.
that’s beautiful… but it won’t happen. You can make people happier but you can’t stop mental health issues… Don’t leave me.
@Nat
Maybe science will one day come up with a way to do just that.
They are quite close.
Even genetically or with nanotech to make it so that chemical imbalances are a thing of the past or at least transient.
Then what’s the point in living? Everyone just blissfully happy, the thought of it makes me sickly depressed…
It’s not over until it’s over. You might make a miraculous recovery like the Pune Warriors did today in the IPL. Who would have thought they would win after they were bowled out for 130. I think that most people have a lifetime of false hope. We are all just batteries designed to keep those on extreme sides of the spectrum in wealthy surroundings or if they are a criminal/benefit scrounger on life support. The key is not hoping that you can build something but to accept your position in life.
Nat, why would you be depressed at being blissful?
@One Cool Cat,
I refuse to accept my position.
And I can no longer lie to myself about it.
And there is nothing in this world that I want or I want to do so no reason to continue.
I refuse to labor just to make the rich richer and to help support some people who choose not to put in work.
Just a few of my reasons.
Most of my earnings have been wasted on gambling and booze but even on my salary I could still afford to do something productive if I didn’t waste so much. You should set yourself a target. I’m going to try and sort out my debt problem but I also want to watch the IPL live in India. With tickets starting at 600rs to 12,000rs plus airfare that’s within my range. Won’t get a chance in the future to watch the great Sachin Tendulkar live. The legends Rahul Dravid, VVS Laxman, Gilchrist are all aproaching retirement. set yourself a target in the future. If you fall short there’s always another target.
I have a target.
Leaving this world behind.
And hopefully this time I will not fail.
U.N. Owen it would be odd to see u go amd it would suck. Ur always smart with awsome advice and u honestly seem like the best and nicest person ever. I do truely hope u win the lottery and travel the whole world and see everyone in it… I wont wish u a long life ( it seems insulting on such a sight) but i wish u for as long as u do stay around a happy life and when u do sadly leave us a speady jurney to a happier exsistence