Inevitable Hope

I feel my feet leave the ground
As the lies make me weightless
This false freedom all around
Sweeps true reality down

And I struggle to see the truth
Because I’ve been here before
Countless times I’ve risen
To these cloudy illusions
Only to fall farther
When the delusion disintegrates

I try with everything
To resist the beautiful sins
Beckoning to me with forked tongues
And to warped perfections I involuntarily cling

But I float nonetheless
On the wings of doomed bliss
Knowing its damnation
Hating myself for this weakness

And I struggle to see the truth
Because I’ve been here before
Countless times I’ve risen
To these cloudy illusions
Only to fall farther
When the delusion disintegrates

It takes me to memories
And remembered possibilities
I feel the muffled hope
But know my inabilities

This knowledge breaks my flight
Plunging downward through the night
Panicked regret fills my tearful eyes
As the slippery dream dies

The misty nights clammier than ever
The loneliness exponentially sharper
Cuts my already bloody heart deeper
Until only a seeping hole remains
And I suffer in the shadowy rains
Waiting for the next set of betraying angel-wings
To carry me higher and let me fall harder
Than these faltering things

Damned to forever imagine feathers