Being there for someone who needs to talk…

…is like oral sex:  if I don’t get it, I don’t have to give it.

You’ve got happy people who don’t want you ‘dumping’ on them–completely self-absorbed assholes who maintain their own happiness by living 100% for themselves and if you don’t feed that happiness or serve a purpose for them, then you’re a boil.

Then you’ve got people who hurt so bad, they can’t see past their own problems.  They have such an urgent need to talk, they shut out other people who also need to talk, so they go around desperately looking for someone to ‘dump’ on, while not helping anyone else themselves.  It takes time to fit into this category.  My entire life, I’d be there for anyone and everyone–friends, family, people I worked with, people at a bus stop, anyone.   No more.  It never ever ever comes around to being your turn.  Ever.  Who are all these selfish mother fuckers??  I’m 50–when is it my turn??  No more.  Not even one more person and I don’t care if they’ve crawled out a window.  I don’t get it, I don’t have to give it.  Period.

Then, what you get most of now in the age of the internet are all these people crawling the web looking for someone to pep talk to.  What?  You don’t even know these people!  And on the face of it, there’s no problem with that, except that every single one of them has someone in their actual lives they won’t do that for.  That’s what’s fucked up.  That’s deranged.

There’s no such thing as someone who doesn’t know at least one person in real life that needs someone to talk to.  Can’t find them?   Or do you just only get that good feeling from ‘helping’ total strangers you never laid eyes on and will never meet?  We tell people we actually know to fuck off and then go try to help total strangers.  That’s deranged.   I get people I don’t even know asking me intimate questions, and people who actually know me wanting to talk about absolutely nothing of substance.  Fucked up much?

This is the kind of conversation you’re supposed to have with someone you just met:  Hi, my name is _________, I’m single, Pisces, my favorite color is blue, I have a dog and a cat, no kids yet, and I work at ______________.  If you’ve known someone four years and all you talk about are food, TV shows, and your very fucked up church, then you’re confused.  Why is everything so fucking backwards??  And all those faceless, nameless masses you’re trying to be batman for?  You’re giving them nothing more than a few bumper stickers and a shove.  It’s impossible to give them more than that.  And you can’t hug them over the internet either.  Those little huggy emotes are nothing but pictures.  Pictures can’t hug.

It’s oral sex.  If I don’t get it, I don’t have to give it.  Period, end of sentence.

Right now, there’s someone you actually know and see every day that hurts so fucking bad, they barely function.  Find them.  Ask them if they need to talk.  If they have something they need to talk about, sit there, shut up, and then let them tell you what that is.  This isn’t hard.