Hello. I am 21 years old and an old friend to depression. I believe I have always been depressed. In middle school and high school, I had no close friends. I have gone one date in my entire life. I am not academically gifted given the fact that I have no willpower. Three quarters ago, I had a 4.0 in college and now I have a 3.06. I feel inferior to my sister who has always been better at me at everything. My brother doesn’t give a shit about me at all and has attacked me on some of my issues. I have been to a counselour and a psychologist. Every time I talked about suicide, my counselour would threaten me with sending me to this expensive place that would burden my family. The pills drove me insane and nearly led me to nearly hurting my sister and at times drove to insanity.
Talking about insanity, I have created multiple imaginary friends. They were the reason I got through Highschool. I don’t know if they are imaginary but they do use my voice to talk to me.
I have attempted suicide many times. strangulation, pills, drowning, and other ways. I tried last night to induce organ failure with acetaphamine-hydrocodone. I first took 6 pills then three minutes later took 8. All together I took 16-17 pills of it last night. Had a massive headache and forced myself to throwup.
I think I am going to try again tonight
7 comments
Would you like to consider talking to somebody first?
like?
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What I mean is, I have. I have talked to my sister, I have talked with my parents. It doesn’t help. The pit of despair justs gets bigger.
Have you talked to other people going through the suicide situation?
Personally, don’t know anyone who is in that situation. My email is though to all is :takuna2010@yahoo.com
I sent you an email. Respond if you feel like talking. I’m here as a friend, not a counselor that is going to tell you not to kill yourself. 🙂
Kidney and or liver failure isn’t the way to go, tylenol will destroy your organs and it will be painful.
That’s the plan.