not consoling

“Just push through it. It will get better. Wait this crisis out, it’ll all be okay. This is not permanent”. I appreciate the thought when I read responses like this on this site or elsewhere, but it isn’t consoling because its not entirely true. Change is inevitable, but it will not be “better”. My situations, circumstances and issues change constantly, but I struggle (too much) with all of them, always. Sorry to be vulgar, but in other words: sh*t always gets replaced by equally sh*tty sh*t. The people, places, and problems in life always change, but the general luster of life is constant. I’m not suicidal because of any one event or person. You often hear: “I lost my job, now I have no hope”, or “I cannot live without him/her”. This isn’t me. I’ve lost jobs before, never had a relationship, but I don’t seem to be buffeted by single situations. It’s just they don’t stop coming. Granted, sometimes (rarely, actually) they get resolved or at least forgotten to the point where it doesn’t matter anymore, but then the next batch of pain comes in. New and always painful. Relentlessly my struggles attack me, each an individual battle in their own time, adding up to this 22 year war I’ve been fighting. I know its just me, if only I was a better person I could handle it, but I cannot. “Sometimes, time doesn’t heal, no not at all. It just stands still, while we fall”.