Does this sound pathetic and corny ?

Im trying to write my final note – But i don’t wanna sound to boring and ” woah is me ” – so without further ado is an excerpt from my suicide letter –
I lost interest in everything , even music , Music was my everything , my comfort , my hobbies , my lifestyle , Even being a piano player for eight years you would think i would have come to love and cherish every moment i could play on my beloved piano- But i was ( excuse me – am) so broken , even my beloved music couldn’t save me from the hurt and pain i was ( am ) feeling. This was ( is ) really hard to write because it was ( is ) hard to leave everything behind and die. I constantly would ask myself do i really wanna die , or is this just hormones? I always thought life was like a great piece of music- It can be really happy or sad or a mix of emotions – But my song was really sad …. So sad that it convinced me to leave everything behind me and die. I had hopes and dreams , I always wanted to be a good influence , and i was always bubbly , I had always hoped that one day i would be so famous and have a lot of money… apparently i was such a good actor that no one noticed that i wanted to die , just fake it and put on a believeable smile… that didn’t work for as long as i hoped it would – It hurt to much to keep it in … I started becoming less and less believable ..