Who wants to DO something then?

OK – I feel exactly the same as many of you. I have been totally fucked by mentally ill parents in complete denial of reality. I must endure the results of having my mind twisted and broken as a little child. I must go on with my ‘life’ without the support network of normal people, and I see the unappreciative shitheads who were fortunate to end up with a decent life having gotten off on the right foot. I have put a lot of energy into ‘being positive’ and making something good for myself but the battle is uphill and very difficult to win. Little victories don’t mean anything when you are losing the war.

SO: what to do?

Well, despite thinking about the obvious which is what brought me here, I also have an alternative. Being in the position of “I don’t give a shit about anyone or anything and I don’t care about dying” is in fact VERY POWERFUL. It puts you ABOVE all the worthless losers who cling dearly to their pathetic lives and would resist dying at nay cost. I always think of the character Kaiser Zosay in the movie – the usual suspects. His power was that HE WAS WILLING TO DO WHAT THE OTHER GUY WOULD NEVER DO.

It seems to me pretty obvious: you / we / I could do whatever we want to make our lives fun, fulfilling, happy, meaningful – IF – we were to do do something besides be pathetic victims. I am not criticizing you – I play the pathetic victim too. But I believe there is an alternative. Those people you hate, who torture you, rub your face in your bad luck, who are ungrateful for the luck they have received? They would cower in fear and beg for their lives if they faced death – and I / you / we could easily put them in that position if we were to use our lack of fear of death as our ADVANTAGE. This will be fun. This will be profitable. This will be something worth living for. This is what I am doing now – research, planning, meeting low-lifes who have experience and good advice. I just need partners since doing many of these things is too difficult or risky alone.

Want to go out with a bang and not a whimper? Want the last chapter in your life to be BIG? Fun? Newsworthy? Profitable? Exciting? Well – it is what I am working on and you can be there to if you want to join me.

INBOX ME.