Just Listen… Please.

I’m not telling you this because  I want attention, or want you to feel bad for me, or to blame anything on you, or anyone else. I just need to vent, and since I have no actual friends to text or call up, that will actually care, and not say “oh” the entire time. So I chose you, hopeing that you’ll listen. I’m worse than ever now.. I want to go back to school, I hate being here so much. I isolate myself in my room, because I hate everyone. This Insomnia blows. The littlest thing sets off my depression. My counsler is a ***** that keeps canceling my appointments and pushing them off to a later date. So, if I do decide to go through with my plan of suicide, it’s partially her to blame. If I had someone to talk to about everything going on right now, then maybe I wouldn’t be going insane again. I just really hate myself. I wanna cut, so fucking bad right now. But.. I can’t. I’ve came too far. That’s a lie. I’ve gotten no where. I’m were I was before I did get help, I never actually got any better. They made me think I did, but truth is, I didn’t. When one good thing happens to me in life, I fuck it up. Which sucks, considering good things rarely happen to me in my life. All people do is yell at me. I want to kill so many people, for the littlest things. That makes me sound crazy, but I’m serious. I hate life. Everyone is a *****. No one cares. And the people that do care, eventually leave. I’m sorry for venting to someone that isn’t my friend, that could give a fuck less.