Its understandable…

I get it, people move on. You get older and your friends start to drift apart, they go and live life. I understand that. I just cant understand why everyone else is so comfortable and normal. How does this happen? I dont understand, everyone seems to be moving forward. Everyone else seems to know what the fuck they’re doing except me. Honestly it just seems like everyone is moving away from me, not away from each other. Im standing still. Its seems like they talk all the time and go out and hang with each other still. Meanwhile im here alone in my room. It actually hurts my feelings alot when I find out they’re hanging out and I dont get so much as a text or invite… Of course I would never bring this up because they would just think im being weird. But it has always been this way, I have always been the outcast of the group and they know this. The awkward one of the group. The shy one that couldn’t help pick up chicks. The quiet one with absolutely no social skills at the party. Now im still the broke one with no job. The one with no girlfriend. They’re leaving me behind. I honestly cant see things getting any better. Im almost 23 and have no accomplishments whatsoever. I wish I could end it but I cant. I couldnt do that to my mom. If only there was a way for me to cease to exist completely. Fade out like I never existed in the first place…