I don’t know how much longer I can do this. My first attempt was 2 years ago. Everything is so overwhelming and I want to try again right now, but what if I survive? I don’t want my therapist to leave and I probably wouldn’t see my cat for a while. Not to mention my parents would be distraught. What’s the point anymore? I have no one in my life to talk to (except my therapist) and I have no motivation to even try to get better. Someone help me :(.
3 comments
I love you.
Hi. First, I’m sorry you’re hurting. I, too, don’t know how much longer I can do this. You mentioned concern over trying again (to leave)–that your therapist might leave. Is it that you fear your therapist would give up on you if you made an attempt but remained alive? I read an insider publication for therapists who deal with suicidal patients. Many expressed consternation over patients who attempted–as if we were wasting their time. I hope your therapist is exceptional in this regard, and cares chiefly about your emotional well-being.
What most motivated me to comment, though, were your lines, “What’s the point? I have no one in my life to talk to…and I have no motivation to even try to get better.” That describes my situation, too. Not too long ago my motivation was experiencing the bliss of companionship, intimacy. Now that that, too, is gone, unlikely ever to reappear lastingly, I have no more motivation either.
What’s holding you together? How are you getting through the day’s hours? If you ever want to talk more about this, you can email me at spam14641@gmail.com. I’d be happy to swap stories, or even just listen. I hope you find some peace today.
Hey Nothing. I believe my therapist is truly amazing, she’s the best I’ve ever had. My fear is that she’ll think she has ‘failed’ her job and will want me to be transferred to another therapist. I don’t think she would, but my fears take over my mind and make me believe in them.
At the moment I think the pain my family will go through is keeping me together. I’m desperately trying to hold on to any bit of hope, despite not wanting to. I’m sorry to hear that you feel the same, if you ever feel like chatting just message me.