crushed

Im just over it all, everything just kepps pilling on. Today I found out my recovery time is going to take way longer almost a year plus. On top of all this my parent sno longer trust me what so ever. Everyone I know just seems to shrung me off when I look for help. I cant possibly go on, my life is going to be extremely painful and I dont want to live a life of pain why not just end it all now. Sure everyone will be heart broken for a month then everything will go back to normal ill just be another statistic. I know if I go on ill just piss it all away in bews and drugs, I never been so bitter in my life everything has been taken away. Its funny i dont even care how I go I think my 12 guage will do just fine.