Point in Life?

Hello Harpergirl,

There are a few reasons I could tell you not to feel so sad about what has happened to you. I could say “There are people a lot worse off than you.” or “Birthday’s aren’t that important.” or “At least two of your friends remembered.” or “It’s just your age, in ten years you’ll look back and laugh at this.”

But you know what? I’m not saying that. I know about feeling sad about something small that other people consider to be nothing at all. Even the slightest thing setting you off and when a whole bunch of things conspire to get you down all in a row it feels like the end of the world.

Trust me when I say that I’ve been through some seriously bad experiences that started at the age of three years old for me. Perhaps they started earlier, thankfully I have absolutely no memories before three!

Let me tell you I’ve tried most things to blank out the pain and sadness that I feel for the last forty years. Shrinks, hospitals, medication, narcotics, alcohol, meaningless sex and just about every other vice I could – just so I could feel that blessed “nothing” for a few moments to interrupt the constant crushing depression. You know what… none of them worked beyond a few moments and eventually made things worse.

I’ve pretty much destroyed my body now with all the substance abuse over the years and my mind isn’t faring much better but thankfully I can get through each day with minimal pain.

Here’s how I do it:
I don’t ever think about what I don’t have.
I don’t ever think about what other people might think of me. (personal crazy!)
I take joy in the little things.
I am grateful for what I do have. (let me tell you I don’t have much at all)
I am always honest with myself and those around me.
I always try and treat other people how I would like to be treated. Being a good person is it’s own reward.
I do not compromise myself to appease other people, I will be loved by those who love what I am, no matter what that is. – Those that mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind.
Above all, I remember that life is not something that is owed to me, it’s not going to take shape around me if I do nothing. What I invest in life is usually returned to me.

To you, Harpergirl, may I suggest you relax a little. Let me tell you that popularity might seem important right now but unless you’re planning on a career in politics or showbiz then it’s really nothing to get messed up about. Being yourself (and happy with who you are) should be your first objective – the rest comes when you are least expecting it.

I hope some of that helped you out.