Just about everyone who posts on this site knows that the best day of their life won’t come that fast or easily. Perhaps peddle your platitudes elsewhere.
“Everything happens for a reason†WTF
What are people really saying?
Are they talking about cause and effect, “the reason this is happening is because such and such happened before itâ€
Basically you’re screwed if your causes keep recreating bad experiences and snow ball.
Are they talking about fate? Life happens and is going to continue to happen, at the end of it all it will make sense – a appeal to History (ask the hundreds and millions in the Soviet Union how the appeal to history work out for them) – just keep believing that at the end it will all make sense. Life’s a ***** and then we don’t die
Are they talking about destiny and God? There is a plan and the pain you and the world experience is a part of that plan, maybe a test for a world to come and if you believe correctly your pain will be transformed into a greater good? Our pain is good, God is good.
Thousands die in a food and the good believer’s passes out food and blankets, a traumatised child smiles, clings to these good people and maybe even becomes a believer. God is good they sing out, the suffering of the many who no longer have a voice already forgotten.
Are they saying, don’t worry, in time you will be able to refrain the experience into something meaningful. Yea! A placebo good for as long as we can hold on to this subjective thing called meaning.
“Everything happens for a reasonâ€, I can’t stand that fucking platitude. Just something we say when we don’t know what to say and can’t keep our mouths shut.
It can only come from a place of fear, something to cling to as we get dragged down as deep within we know the truth.
Everything that doesn’t kill you doesn’t make you stronger.
“Everything happens for a reason†WTF do you realise the implications of what those words mean, the horror those words represent!
I can see why people would have trouble with that sign. The last sentence in particular. But you find it inspirational and it helps you feel better…so don’t let others shit on your hope. *hugs*
To AscahlsBroken: don’t listen to those freaks. They put themselves on here just to rant their shit out. Don’t listen to them. You post it for yourself. And it all does make sense. If you want to believe, keep believing. If you want to fight it out, do that. No one can accuse you for doing so, now say it again and again, just like in this post, it will keep you away from self-reproach.
I know for sure that every single thing we do, we do for a reason. So there’s a reason behind everything, but sometimes we can’t figure it out. And do we really need to?
Remember, you’re perfect, you’re great, you deserve the best. I wish you were my friend. And that day you’re looking forward to, it will come. I’m absolutely sure it will come. Just wait a while, you won’t regret it.
It is not my intention to shit on someone’s inspiration or hope
I usually hold my tongue when people pull out that platitude as I understand the need people have for saying it.
I respect their need yet on a site such as this, I would also have them respect the needs of the depressed and really think about how the platitudes they are spouting might be taken.
If everything happens for a reason it must include both the good and the bad, and the implications….
Most people don’t spend allot of time, if any, thinking about what the words they say might mean or be taken to mean. While the depressed are likely to spend allot of time thinking about what the words might mean.
The truth is platitudes have more to say to the person spouting them then the recipients.
We say them because we don’t or can’t be present to another’s pain, and the emptiness of silence in that moment is terrifying.
I understand the need to believe there is a reason to everything, with the unspoken assumption that the reason will be good, if not now then tomorrow and if not tomorrow in the end… In the face of others troubles we must anesthetize or own fear.
Would it not be more helpful to hold their hand and sit in the silence pain creates, in silence, together?
A person finding meaning/reason in their experiences, both good and bad, is great, something to work towards even, but it is also very personal.
@left22 You always leave thoughtful comments. Your rant didn’t come across as a personal attack, in my opinion. You didn’t say Ascah shouldn’t be on this site.
@left22
I actually really liked your rant, it was really well thought out. I appreciate your comment, it gave me a few things to think about.
I didn’t like what Veruda said, that’s all 🙂
The rant felt good, it’s been a difficult winter.
Lately I find myself horrified by some of the things we say when our intention is to comfort.
Where “all things happen for a reason†“all things are permissible†a road that can only end in nihilism and is I think a source of so much of the pain as expressed on this site.
In a world where “everything happens for a reason†is acceptable we can only submit, slaves and cannon fodder to this master “for a reason†that we do not get to understand.
“All things happen for a reason†is the end justifying the means but what in the end is left to justify the ends but the means?
The end is always in the beginning, what is unjust in the beginning remains unjust in the end.
To free oneself though a path of terror in order to create a better end can only create an end in which terror is acceptable.
What is it we are creating?
This is the truth that I know; every creation is a destruction, every destruction a creation, this is both the horror and wonder of life that each of us must, in their way, come to terms with.
I find myself torn between silence (quietism) and rebellion the refusal to appeal to history or God, hope or meaning, yet continue to stand.
In the Story of Job the final response to the problem is silence and in the silence it seams a rebellion perhaps allowing consciousness to the numinous of both its horror and wonder.
In regards to “all things happen for a reason†– i couldn’t agree more – it’s a feel good saying to justify both good and bad but it’s hollow and has no scientific value. everything that happens is result of other actions and circumstances that dictate a course of action or reactions … that’s about the only “reason” stuff happens.
I’m not much a fan of the word “deserve” either:
http:// suicideproject.org/2013/04/deserve/
But all that said I generally don’t like to squash the attempts to show people that things can and could be better.
The general premise of the graphic above is correct – how we view the future is how we choose to view it … yes, there are some truths that might be negative, but we already know what those are and can prepare and plan to work around those. and who is to say that even though there is only a 13 million to 1 chance to win the lottery … that tomorrow it might not be our ticket that wins? it could happen … but only if you buy the ticket.
no matter the odds or the circumstances… you gotta play to win
11 comments
Just about everyone who posts on this site knows that the best day of their life won’t come that fast or easily. Perhaps peddle your platitudes elsewhere.
this is some bullshit.
“Everything happens for a reason†WTF
What are people really saying?
Are they talking about cause and effect, “the reason this is happening is because such and such happened before itâ€
Basically you’re screwed if your causes keep recreating bad experiences and snow ball.
Are they talking about fate? Life happens and is going to continue to happen, at the end of it all it will make sense – a appeal to History (ask the hundreds and millions in the Soviet Union how the appeal to history work out for them) – just keep believing that at the end it will all make sense. Life’s a ***** and then we don’t die
Are they talking about destiny and God? There is a plan and the pain you and the world experience is a part of that plan, maybe a test for a world to come and if you believe correctly your pain will be transformed into a greater good? Our pain is good, God is good.
Thousands die in a food and the good believer’s passes out food and blankets, a traumatised child smiles, clings to these good people and maybe even becomes a believer. God is good they sing out, the suffering of the many who no longer have a voice already forgotten.
Are they saying, don’t worry, in time you will be able to refrain the experience into something meaningful. Yea! A placebo good for as long as we can hold on to this subjective thing called meaning.
“Everything happens for a reasonâ€, I can’t stand that fucking platitude. Just something we say when we don’t know what to say and can’t keep our mouths shut.
It can only come from a place of fear, something to cling to as we get dragged down as deep within we know the truth.
Everything that doesn’t kill you doesn’t make you stronger.
“Everything happens for a reason†WTF do you realise the implications of what those words mean, the horror those words represent!
That’s a really good rant.
You have an excellent point.
A terrible one, but its excellent.
I can see why people would have trouble with that sign. The last sentence in particular. But you find it inspirational and it helps you feel better…so don’t let others shit on your hope. *hugs*
To AscahlsBroken: don’t listen to those freaks. They put themselves on here just to rant their shit out. Don’t listen to them. You post it for yourself. And it all does make sense. If you want to believe, keep believing. If you want to fight it out, do that. No one can accuse you for doing so, now say it again and again, just like in this post, it will keep you away from self-reproach.
I know for sure that every single thing we do, we do for a reason. So there’s a reason behind everything, but sometimes we can’t figure it out. And do we really need to?
Remember, you’re perfect, you’re great, you deserve the best. I wish you were my friend. And that day you’re looking forward to, it will come. I’m absolutely sure it will come. Just wait a while, you won’t regret it.
It is not my intention to shit on someone’s inspiration or hope
I usually hold my tongue when people pull out that platitude as I understand the need people have for saying it.
I respect their need yet on a site such as this, I would also have them respect the needs of the depressed and really think about how the platitudes they are spouting might be taken.
If everything happens for a reason it must include both the good and the bad, and the implications….
Most people don’t spend allot of time, if any, thinking about what the words they say might mean or be taken to mean. While the depressed are likely to spend allot of time thinking about what the words might mean.
The truth is platitudes have more to say to the person spouting them then the recipients.
We say them because we don’t or can’t be present to another’s pain, and the emptiness of silence in that moment is terrifying.
I understand the need to believe there is a reason to everything, with the unspoken assumption that the reason will be good, if not now then tomorrow and if not tomorrow in the end… In the face of others troubles we must anesthetize or own fear.
Would it not be more helpful to hold their hand and sit in the silence pain creates, in silence, together?
A person finding meaning/reason in their experiences, both good and bad, is great, something to work towards even, but it is also very personal.
@left22 You always leave thoughtful comments. Your rant didn’t come across as a personal attack, in my opinion. You didn’t say Ascah shouldn’t be on this site.
@left22
I actually really liked your rant, it was really well thought out. I appreciate your comment, it gave me a few things to think about.
I didn’t like what Veruda said, that’s all 🙂
The rant felt good, it’s been a difficult winter.
Lately I find myself horrified by some of the things we say when our intention is to comfort.
Where “all things happen for a reason†“all things are permissible†a road that can only end in nihilism and is I think a source of so much of the pain as expressed on this site.
In a world where “everything happens for a reason†is acceptable we can only submit, slaves and cannon fodder to this master “for a reason†that we do not get to understand.
“All things happen for a reason†is the end justifying the means but what in the end is left to justify the ends but the means?
The end is always in the beginning, what is unjust in the beginning remains unjust in the end.
To free oneself though a path of terror in order to create a better end can only create an end in which terror is acceptable.
What is it we are creating?
This is the truth that I know; every creation is a destruction, every destruction a creation, this is both the horror and wonder of life that each of us must, in their way, come to terms with.
I find myself torn between silence (quietism) and rebellion the refusal to appeal to history or God, hope or meaning, yet continue to stand.
In the Story of Job the final response to the problem is silence and in the silence it seams a rebellion perhaps allowing consciousness to the numinous of both its horror and wonder.
In regards to “all things happen for a reason†– i couldn’t agree more – it’s a feel good saying to justify both good and bad but it’s hollow and has no scientific value. everything that happens is result of other actions and circumstances that dictate a course of action or reactions … that’s about the only “reason” stuff happens.
I’m not much a fan of the word “deserve” either:
http:// suicideproject.org/2013/04/deserve/
But all that said I generally don’t like to squash the attempts to show people that things can and could be better.
The general premise of the graphic above is correct – how we view the future is how we choose to view it … yes, there are some truths that might be negative, but we already know what those are and can prepare and plan to work around those. and who is to say that even though there is only a 13 million to 1 chance to win the lottery … that tomorrow it might not be our ticket that wins? it could happen … but only if you buy the ticket.
no matter the odds or the circumstances… you gotta play to win
gambling dawg