Alone

So, it’s my Birthday again tomorrow; I’ll be 23. Ever get the feeling of deja vu? Nothing seems to change, aside from an increasing feeling of isolation and a decreasing feeling of motivation for life. I don’t feel human anymore. I don’t want to be alive, I cannot see a way out of my isolation apart from death. Of course, this would seem rather over-dramatic from an outside perspective, from those “just get over it, cheer up!” types. However, for almost a decade now I have had no friends, no connection with others and no affection. I won’t pretend I’m not bitter, because I am, but this bitterness has mostly manifested as complete apathy for life in general.

Well, I’ll continue to be good to others and try to be positive towards people. It’s the only hope I have left… Maybe one day somebody want to get to know me then, and things will change, or maybe I’ll just put a bullet through my head and end it all. Either way, life has a been a massive disappointment, as have people in general.