First let me star off by saying that I am not planning on committing suicide right now. I just do not want to get to that point. I do not know how to express what I am feeling, but I will try to the best of my ability to describe it. I just feel lost, I do not want to do anything anymore. I do not want to move anymore, but I do not want to stay still. I want to live, but I do not want to keep trying to endure this suffering. I have a good family and great friends, just my views are different from theirs and everyone else’s so they cannot understand me. I have tried multiple hobbies but none of them entertain me anymore. The one thing that I truly love, nature, is kept away from me due to severe asthma and allergies. I recently graduated high school so I lost my laptop and with it the programs I used for graphic design which was one of my favorite hobbies. Most of my friends I’ve known since elementary school are going to different colleges. I also recently lost my job. I believe all of this has made this feeling worst and brought me to this point. I just do not know what to do anymore. I keep telling myself things will get better but it’s time for me to come back to reality. I also fail to see the purpose of life. Why am I even trying to endure all this time in a realm of death and hatred? I do not know what to do, I feel like I’ve reached the end of the line. I know what I should do to end all of this, but I’m fighting to find a reason not to. I’m sorry for rambling on so much, I’m just lost. If you read all of this gibberish I appreciate it. Thank you.