I’ve said many times on here that I would NEVER have children….but I know if I did I would be the perfect parent….how do I know this you ask? because I would only have one rule….what kid or teenager wouldn’t love to live in a home with only one rule?…..and that sole rule would be….”if it doesn’t hurt anybody else its okay”….meaning if you do something to yourself…okay fine you only hurt yourself…but if you  aren’t doing anything to hurt anybody else then its allowed….that would be the only rule in my household because it encompasses everything that is good there is no possible way for him or her to undermine that rule because its solid….I mean think about it how can you do anything bad without hurting anybody? you can’t….so if my only rule is to do whatever you please as long as you aren’t hurting anybody how can he or she do anything evil, bad or unwise?
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I hope you are just kidding.
If the kid is intelligent, sounds like the perfect setup for an existential crisis
@CDL: I’m serious…
@Fro: what do you mean?
From a child’s perspective or someone lacking the ability to think critically or beyond their own actions it would be easy to do something that at face value doesn’t seem to harm anyone, but in reality it does indirectly
@SB: If I ask them to think of every person they know and ask themselves if their actions will hurt any of those people in the slightest way and if it does then to not do it….how would they be able to undermine that?….you’re trying to say that to say like the child wouldn’t be able to determine if their actions hurt anybody….but they would know and they would be able to understand and apply that train of thought to guiding their actions…
If we’re talking realistically I don’t think a child would be able to conform to those guidelines flawlessly, but theoretically I think you’re right.
I like Pain’s rule. Although as SB says I think we all of us do at times hurt people indirectly with our actions. It is impossible to know for sure ahead of times all the possible ways that any given action can turn out. The best we can do is at least try to keep our intentions innocent. I think as long as we are never intentionally harming another that is a helluva start.
You cannot differentiate between good and evil or hurting others and not hurting others as easily as you are depicting it (especially if you are a child). That is why just saying “Don’t hurt others” isn’t enough. And that’s why we teach kids stuff like morale thinking etc.
Also if you truly want to educate a child to be ‘good’ you should lead by example. ‘Not hurting others’ isn’t enough, you should instead consider helping others.
@sb: and that’s okay they can make mistakes sometimes but it has to be an honest mistake and not just them making excuses ….over the course of time this way of thinking would take hold and guide them in life
@CDL: I actually agree with one thing you said… That we should lead by example and not just say those things…however you underestimate the logic of a child…you can give them a simple rule and make it so that they can interpret it correctly
Sounds pretty solid to me. Don’t do anything to others that you wouldn’t mind them doing to you.
This reminds me of the Libertarians.
I like it though, keep things simple and put the burden on them actually thinking for themselves. I don’t know that this is something you could do from an early age or if it would be something to switch to as they got older though. Thing is just forcing kids into mindlessly obeying doesn’t teach them to be good people. Most times they just obey out of fear. Eventually they get out of your house and they have to make those decisions for themselves. So you may as well start teaching them to think for themselves early on.
I just dont like people saying theyre the perfect parent if theyve never had a child. Even if they have they are in no position to judge their own educational skills.
What makes a parent perfect is not that simple rule (anyone who teaches anything different from your rule just cannot be a good parent).
@CDL true, perfection is itself an unattainable concept, nothing is perfect. So anyone or anything claiming perfection in anything is pretty much automatically wrong. I would say he could have phrased that part better.
@WhatamIdoinghere: exactly man…. and hell thats how I grew up…straight under fear tactics 101….yelling and assbeatings…only thing my mother ever thought worked….”spear the rod and spoil the child”…that bullshit you know with her being a christian and all….funny thing is though we had women teachers and ministers at my former church and nobody ever complained about this since the bible says women should basically shut the fuck up and men rule everything….but nope….they just forget that part…but kicking your kids ass? they are all for it….
And there is humility/ modesty…
This is what I would say too. I wouldn’t have a problem with my kids doing whatever they like as long as they are aware that actions have consequences and to always be mindful of others. (Not that I’m planning on having kids.)
@ClairDeLune: When I say “perfect” it could be 100% but I don’t mean it in that sense I mean it in the sense of “very excellent or near perfect”….furthermore, people judge their own educational and parental skills all the time why can’t they do it?…
Others can still be good parents but they will more often have multiple rules that are really stupid and some even just purely made to control the teen but see I wouldn’t have all those rules…just one…and that one would be as strong as I needed it to be….how can the child do anything wrong under my one rule?
I am not going to start a discussion again with you again, it didnt work out the last times we did that.
But when I read your posts it seems like education is one of the easiest things you can imagine (“just this one rule”). In fact it is the exact opposite. Otherwise every parent who made a mistake in their children’s education (and that includes pretty much every parent) must have been stupid or evil to do so.
I’m not saying they were how did you even deduce that from what I said CDL
Perfect doesn’t exist. My opinion.