You ever feel numb inside and you just dont want to anything, Â you think about how many people you have hurt you know that you put them through so much pain. You know inside that you should just find a way to get your mind off of things but you turn your music up but your head phones on and all you think about is dying. All you want to do die. Lay in the road…JUST GET OUT OF THE WORLD.. Your ex text you and you just want to cry.. You just want to grab your blade but then you remember you flushed them so you think about how you could possibly get your hands on something new.. You look at your arm and you see your scars fading and you just want to tear your skin off you want to be free you just want to get hit by a car you just dont want to be here anymore you hate it here you hate the world.. You dont care about anything else..except you dont want to hurt your few friends and family… You just wish you could run away disapper and noone would hurt .. UGHH.
3 comments
It is one of the those moments.. you just want to disappear.. like you never existed…but the truth is .. you can only look forward now because you already exist.
Have you thought about opening your eyes wide… not necessarily lowering your own person standard, but just open your eyes wide enough to see that … as long as you are a survivor, there is always a way to find happiness.. even if such happiness is not accepted by the society.. but who cares? If you can survive, you can do anything you want. Simple as that.
Of course. The pure numbness is something else once you’ve gone through the valley of shadow, rock bottom. To feel nothing… just the simple, logical conclusion that death is the only solution. It comes up like a dream you didn’t know you were searching for but desired all this time. I can’t stop the thought in the back of my mind that hopes I flat out die.
I can survive, but I seriously doubt I can do anything I want. That sounds like when you tell children they can be anything when in reality they’re limited by birth… how can you find happiness if don’t know what it feels like?
doubt is the reason why you “doubt” you can do anything you want. The society already dictates what you can or can’t do.. but if you let it go..and just pursue what you truly want…heck just do anything…break a rule for once in your life.. you may feel better after all.
No one can tell you what you will feel in happiness.. because only you can define what that really means to you. For me, it is a state of peacefulness that you know everything will be alright no matter whatever happens. But for you, it may be defined differently. The purpose of your life is then to define what that means to you.. and only to yourself