After my attempt a couple days ago I told my mom and she told me with tears down her eyes that it was selfish. That how can I do that to her. I have not once seen my mom who i love break down before so I sucked all my emotions in and with a straight face told her I would not try ever again. But I know its a promise I can’t keep. Distractions have been coming up I recently got into a relationship but I know I’m not ready for that I’m not stable but I just need something anything that will help me not think of trying once again.
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Take it from a weathered, loner-weirdo; you don’t want to enter a relationship knowing full well you are NOT ready for it. I think you should stick to friendships for now, as a dire mental state coupled with your recent attempt and the state your mum is in will not bode well in the near future.
Talk with your mum, clear the air and let her know everything. Hell, honestly man…if you were my kid and you sixed yourself within my home…shit…man I’d never forgive myself. I’d be a wreck and I’m sure your mother would be too. If you have any favourite past times of your’s, may I suggest you pursue those in the meantime and strengthen the bond between you and your significant other to something just shy of romantic.
Good luck going for’d. *Brohug*