Mental pain now constant

Still pretending to fix something now, as I have quite literally given up. However, I am a man of my word and I won’t kill myself until June 22nd. Only recently has the pain of depression (and yes, major depression can cause pain) been constant. Previously it has been on and off, but now I can’t shake it. I won’t have any regrets when I kill myself, because it won’t be as painful as my life is now.