I’m so fucking tired of waking up every night. It takes everything in me to just go to work (I work nights). The only thing I look forward to is sleeping all weekend. Got some bars so it shouldn’t be a problem as long as people will leave me alone. Happy go lucky people make me fucking nauseous. My mind just doesn’t work that way. I see the negativity in everything. People always say to focus on the things that make you happy. I can’t make anyone understand that there is nothing that makes me happy except the fact that I have a bottle of drugs that will absolutely without a doubt put me to sleep forever. I’ve always enjoyed being in a relationship but you have to love yourself first and that’s something I’m not capable of. Last relationship I had didn’t even last a month. Before that was the same thing. So that’s what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life. Its not something I’ve recently dealt with its been going on for years. Just wanted to grip a little
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6 comments
Nice Gripe!! Think of the POSITIVE side…you’ll have a different relationship every month. You’ll never be bored or become stagnant. Nice!
Ya know, if there weren’t us grumpy shits in the world all the “happy-go-lucky” people wouldn’t look so happy-go-lucky. There’d be nothing to compare them to!! So..Grump on Mr Negative…we got work to do.
You mentioned a bottle of drugs that will put you to sleep forever, what are they, where did you get them coz they sound like exactly what I need. You’ll understand if you read my post ‘The Decision’ your Response would be much appreciated thank you. Btw I totally agree, I just want to punch every smiley happy go lucky **** in the eye.
It just seems fake to me that anyone can be happy all the fucking time.
I don’t think people are happy all the time, i’d say the word is contempt, more of a secondary and mellower emotion. Constant happiness would lose it’s luster soon enough and turn into… well, maybe contempt as well.
As for the relationship thing, i don’t know about you, but long failing relationships seem as bad as a lot of short ones. I’ve been literally dating half of my life (a couple of 3+ years relationships), all failed ones. And yeah, you’re right, i was always against the “you have to learn to love yourself first to love someone”, but after all those wasted years… i’d say it’s pretty much accurate, and one of the main reason of my failures.
My bad, i didn’t meant contempt, more like peace, or a subtler emotion. I guess my english still sucks.
I wish I had access to that bottle