She’s right, whatever her name is
We had a deal.
I hid from the pain
And she took my place.
What if I don’t want to be numb anymore?
What if i’m tired of not feeling anything?
No happiness,
No sadness,
Nothing at all.
She was my shield for many years
She protected me from the horrors of this world
Now I relieve her from her post,
But she doesn’t want to go.
She clings on to me
I can find no way to get her out of my head
“Fat”, “ugly”, “worthless”, “useless”
She knows all my weaknesses and faults
And all she does is point them out.
She moves my arms and legs sometimes
I’m her puppet.
No matter how hard I try to stop her
She finds a way to make me do things.
So how can I destroy her?
How can I free myself from the hell she puts me through?
How can I ever escape from her voice inside my head,
If at the end of the day
She’s me.
2 comments
Sometimes you need to weed your garden so that the things you love have more space to bloom.
I enjoyed your words, I think this is beautiful.
That’s a fine piece of writing. Keep on posting and keep on seeing your psychologist. We’re with you.
I have one request though. Make a list of 3 things you like about yourself. You don’t have to post them if you’re not comfortable doing so but do it for yourself.