Has anyone had any success faking being happy? If so, I want to hear your ideas…. PLEASE. Iwork at this job that I don’t like at all and I am so depressed that it is getting hard to get up each day. But, I MUST appear happy at work. Our company serves these rich people and you must be nicey-nice and kissy-butt all of the time. I MUST be cheerful, sunny and bright, no matter how terrible or tired I feel.
I know I’m walking around with this stupid, fake goddamn smile pasted on my face, but I risk losing my job if I do not. And it’s just gotta show, but what can I do? I hate my job, my life, my everything… and I am so incredibly fucking exhausted every day. Functioning is hard. I swore I’d rather hang myself than ever be fake, but I can’t afford to lose this job. At my age, finding another one would be impossible and I’m too tired to work at any job where I have to stand, so yes, McDonald’s is out. Anyhow, I suspect with my depression that I would never be happy anyplace else, either.
So, any ideas on faking happiness are appreciated.
Also – I chose a date and am holding a countdown. I think the only think keeping me going is that I know I am finally going to get to die. I am not working on actual plans yet; right now I’m investigating methods so I can be certain to get it right the first time. Winding up in a looney bin would be much, much worse than the hell I’m in now. Considering I have no money, the fuckers at the looney bin would come after everything I owned and leave me homeless, and that IS a fate worse than death.
2 comments
Faking happiness is an illusion that just doesn’t always work. A fake smile will only serve to increase your unhappiness, as you’ll undoubtedly “catch” yourself smiling and remember how it’s all a facade. There is no roadmap to being happy. It is a complex emotion, one that is dynamic and exclusive to each person. I can understand your statement regarding being “fake,” and how it isn’t something you can do. I agree, it isn’t a lifestyle one should be accustomed to. It sounds like you don’t like your job. Is there a particular set of skills that you know will take you away from the “kiss-up” responsibilities? I can understand how you need the job, however in the meantime, look for something that will take you away from that atmosphere. When you’re faced with the haughty people, dwell on the fact that you’re looking for a better more satisfying job. Don’t shoot low either. Apply for the jobs that appear out of your league. I believe in you. Take things one day at a time. Don’t dwell on thoughts of homelessness, poverty or dissatisfaction. Keep a journal and record each day’s thoughts. It’ll help. Trust me.
Thank you for your reply – I do appreciate your words.
Unfortunately, it is a 4-person company and we all have to act happy, so the only way out is another job. I don’t have much faith right now, but I am also depressed badly and maybe I won’t be tomorrow.
Thank you again.