if i could only help some one

maybe i feel much more of a purpose, ive gone my whole life be selfish, no im more alone then i ever was, even during my past depression. I have anxitey, last night it leaked in to my dreams, as i shook the fetal postion for a drop of compassion. maybe i just hope someone would help me, i put on a ever so happy front, when this depression stuck so down deep, i wish someone would help me, show me