I don’t even know what this is anymore. I used to be able to feel the pain, but apparently, if you immerse yourself in enough pain, you eventually stop feeling it. And I’m starting to miss it. I don’t even know. Anything, I guess. I’m lost in the world, and I’m not really sure I want to fin my way again. This is all I’ve ever known, and I don’t know what life will be like if everything were perfect. Suicide isn’t a last resort anymore- it’s the only option. And I have no choice but to take it eventually.
1 comment
Find yourself first before you worry about shooting off a backbearing and finding your way back onto the beaten track. Do stop to admire the view along the way, and immerse yourself in the daily qualms of the people around you instead of the pain within – there’ll be plenty of time for that later. Nothing will ever be perfect per se, but it can be “perfectly acceptable” and I think that’d be a fairer assessment on anything to do with my personal circumstances and perhaps yours too.
We need more bowls!